NLP At Work : The Difference That Makes the Difference in Business

of dealing with that external experience. Our experience of
people around is reflected by our perceptions of them inside
ourselves. To change what we experience externally we must
change our attitudes and perceptions within. To achieve a
change in my circumstances, I first of all need to be able to
imagine that change having taken place in the way I want it to.
For the process outlined above to become second nature
(so that you are using it unconsciously and in real time, for
example while you are in a conversation with someone), it
helps to work through it “offline” first of all. Do this with a
situation that you have experienced in the past or one that
you anticipate may happen in the future. It is rehearsal and
practice that make this an unconscious skill.

The structure for resolving conflict outlined above is a way of
continuously learning and growing in positive and constructive
ways from what might be a negative and uncomfortable
experience. With this kind of structure we can manage our
thinking no matter what the circumstances. Subsequently we find
that we are influencing the environments of which we are a part.

RESOLVING CONFLICT: PARTS INTEGRATION 333

SUMMARY

THOUGHT PROVOKERS

1 What parts of yourself do you recognize might be in conflict with

each other today?

2 What conflict do you experience between people outside of

yourself? How do the people outside of you symbolize parts of

yourself?

3 Remember a time when you experienced conflict and you found a

way to resolve it within yourself. How did you do that?

4 What physical symptoms do you recognize as signals from your

unconscious to you? How well do you listen and act on what your

unconscious is telling you?