Feist−Feist: Theories of
Personality, Seventh
EditionIII. Humanistic/Existential
Theories- May: Existential
Psychology
© The McGraw−Hill^355
Companies, 2009Chapter 12 May: Existential Psychology 349Death is not the only avenue of nonbeing, but it is the most obvious one. Life
becomes more vital, more meaningful when we confront the possibility of our death.
Nearly 40 years before his own death, May (1958a) spoke of death as “the one fact
of my life which is not relative but absolute, and my awareness of this gives my ex-
istence and what I do each hour an absolute quality” (p. 49).
When we do not courageously confront our nonbeing by contemplating death,
we nevertheless will experience nonbeing in other forms, including addiction to al-
cohol or other drugs, promiscuous sexual activity, and other compulsive behaviors.
Our nonbeing can also be expressed as blind conformity to society’s expectations or
as generalized hostility that pervades our relations to others.
The fear of death or nonbeing often provokes us to live defensively and to re-
ceive less from life than if we would confront the issue of our nonexistence. As May
(1991) said, “we are afraid of nonbeing and so we shrivel up our being” (p. 202). We
flee from making active choices; that is, we make choices without considering who
we are and what we want. We may try to avoid the dread of nonbeing by dimming
FIGURE 12.1 Healthy People Live Simultaneously inUmwelt, Mitwelt,andEigenwelt.
EigenweltUmwelt Mitwelt