New York Magazine - USA (2022-01-03)

O

n september20,2020,their36thanni-

versary,SegundoGuallpaconvincedhis

wifetocometoa friend’s housetoplay

cards.LuzGuamanwastired,butshewantedto

keepaneyeonherhusband’s drinking.Shenever

sawthesurpriseparty coming.“Nextyear, you’ll see,”

Guallpatoldher. “Everythingwillbedifferent.”

TheyhadmarriedinEcuadorwhenGuamanwas

15.He left tofindworkintheU.S.,andshefollowed

yearslater.Afterheseveredparts oftwofingersina

constructionaccident,herwagesat a clothingfactory

keptthemafloat.Whentheirfourchildrengothome

fromschool,it wastheirfatherwhogreetedthem,

thehousefragrantfromhiscooking.Butin 20 13,

Guallpawasassaultedonthestreetsobadlyhesuf-

feredpermanentbraindamage. He begantodrink,

andtheamiablemantheneighborscalled“Panchito”

disappearedbehinda bittertorrentofwords.

Bythesummerof2021,they couldn’t make rent,

andtheirlandlordthreatenedeviction.Onenight,

Guamanwasintheyard,sortingrecyclablestosell

andtryingtotuneoutherhusband’s rantingabout

wherethey weregoingtolive,andthenhishands

werearoundherneck.Thekidsheardherscreaming.

Guamanleft thehouseinanambulance.Guallpaleft

inhandcuffs.Theyneversaw eachotheragain.

Guallpaspent 12 dayslockedup.Around1:30

a.m.onAugust 30,anofficerfoundhim.Another

suspectedsuicide.He left a message behind,butno

onehassharedit withGuaman.“Idon’t knowhis

lastwords,” shesays.

Ontheir 37 thanniversary, Guallpahadbeengone

threeweeks.Guamanthinksaboutthehelpshe

wishesherhusbandhadreceivedforhisillnesses,

ra therthanbeingsentto“that jailthey callhell.” She

thinksaboutotherwomenwhowon’t callforhelp

forfearoftheirhusbandsdyingat Rikers.Andshe

thinksaboutthat night.“I wasa victimofdomestic

violence,”shesays.“My daughtertellsme,‘Whatif we

hadn’t calledthepolice? My fatherwasaggressive.

Ratherthanmy fatherdying,youcouldhavedied.

Whatwouldhavehappenedtous?’”

I

nthevideo,EsiasJohnsongrooves in a convenience store to

WhitneyHouston’s“I WannaDanceWith Somebody.” He spins, lets

a shiverrunthroughhisbodyat theline “I wanna feel the heatwith

somebody.”It wasJune 20 16,andJohnson had just graduatedfrom

highschoolinnortheasternMassachusetts. His parents, Tracyand

Jerome,threw hima party.In frontoffriends and family, Jerome dinged a

glasstogeteveryone’sattention.“Thisis a house of love and acceptance,”

hebegan.His sonhadcomeoutasgay, he said, and his boyfriend was in

attendance.“I wantedhimtofeelfreeandabletobehimself,” Jeromesays.

Sai-Sai,ashisparentscalledhim,hadbeendiagnosedovertheyears

withAsperger’ssyndrome,autism,andADHD. He wouldgetmanic,

thensleepallday;once,hetooka carthat wasn’t his,flippedit,and

gotlockedup.He wasalsosweet anddesperatetofindlove.Atchurch,

hewouldofferwomenfootrubs,andhewrotesongsfilledwithlong-

ing.JohnsonalwayssaidhewasgoingtoliveinNewYorkoneday. His

dadhada friend,OldSchool,whohadgottenhisstartproducingmusic

there,andmaybehecouldgethissongsrecorded.

In 2019,whenhewas21,Johnsonmadethemove.He stayedwitha guy

hehadoncedated,untilhegotkickedoutandbegantounravel.He made

threatstoMarymountCollege, wherethe

formerdate hadstudied,andthecampus

wasevacuated.Overthenextfewyears,

Johnsonwasarrestednumeroustimes

forthreateningpeople—mostlymenhe

hadmet onlinewho’drejectedhim,his

parentssay. He spenta yearinRikers.

WhenhecamehomeforMother’sDay in

2021,Tracybeggedhimnottogo backto

thecity. Jerometoldhim,“Youmightlove

New York,butNewYorkdoesn’t loveyou.”

Johnsonassuredthemhewouldbeokay.

A fewmonthslater,hewasarrestedfor

chasinga manintoa bankwitha syringe,

threateningtoinject himwithHIV.

Inhisfinaldaysat Rikers,Johnson

sleptacrossfromAllenCheyKing,whorecallsJohnsoncomplaining of

stomachpainsandofnotbeingabletomovehisbowelsfordays.He put

inmultiplerequeststogo totheclinic,butnoonetookhim.(Somany

peopleweremissingtheirclinicescortsthat a statecourt wouldsoon

ruletheDepartmentofCorrectionhadfailedinitsbasicduty toprovide

medicalcare.) At4:30a.m.onSeptember7, Kingwoke up,saw Johnson

clutchinghisstomachandwincing,andalerteda CO. He checkedon

hima fewhourslater;hishandswerecold,andhisfacewasgray.The

preliminarycauseofdeathwasa lethaldoseofmethadone.

Johnsonhadbeengivena prescriptionfor 40 milligrams,buthis

parentsdon’t knowwhy. Methadoneis normallyprescribedtocombat

opioidwithdrawal.Johnsonlikedtodrink,smoke, andtake ecstasyon

occasion,butnobodywhoknew himsaw himuseanythingharder. For

someonenotaddictedtoopioids,methadonecanbelethal.

BeforehewenttoRikers,JohnsonhadbeenintouchwithOldSchool.

Hewashopingtogetintoa studio.Thelast songhewasworkingonhad

onlythebeginningsoflyrics:“Theworldcangetsocold,youcanforget

whereyafrom/Don’t losesight/Holdlovetight.”

SEGUNDO

GUALLPA, 58

AUGUST 30

ESIAS JOHNSON, 24

SEPTEMBER 7

Guaman and Guallpa.

PHOTOGRAPHS: COURTESY OF TRACY JOHNSON (JOHNSON); COURTESY OF LUZ GUAMAN (GUALLPA)

Esias Johnson