marrying out of the Church and the unhappy
situations which almost invariably result when
a believer marries an unbelieving spouse. I have
pointed out the demands of the Church upon its
members in time, energy, and funds; the deepness
of the spiritual ties which tighten after marriage and
as the family comes; the antagonisms that naturally
follow such mismating; the fact that these and many
other reasons argue eloquently for marriage within
the Church, where husband and wife have common
backgrounds, common ideals and standards, common
beliefs, hopes, and objectives, and, above all, where
marriage may be eternalized through righteous
entry into the holy temple.
Today, it is my hope to follow with a discussion of
family life. This topic is not new nor is it spectacular,
but it is vital. Marriage is relevant in every life, and
family life is the basis of our existence.
Marital Happiness and Unhappiness
The ugly dragon of divorce has entered into our
social life. Little known to our grandparents and not
even common among our parents, this cancer has
come to be so common in our own day that nearly
every family has been cursed by its destructive
machinations. This is one of the principal tools of
Satan to destroy faith, through breaking up happy
homes and bringing frustration of life and distortion
of thought.
Honorable, happy, and successful marriage is surely
the principal goal of every normal person. One who
would purposely or neglectfully avoid its serious
implications is not only not normal but is frustrating
his own program. There are a few people who marry
for spite or marry for wealth or marry on the
rebound after having been jilted. How distorted is
the thinking of such an one!
Marriage is perhaps the most vital of all the decisions
and has the most far-reaching effects, for it has to
do not only with immediate happiness, but also
with eternal joys. It affects not only the two people
involved, but their families and particularly their
children and their children’s children down through
the many generations.
It is absolutely appalling, the number of children
today who are growing up in our society who do
not have two parents, a father and a mother, and
neither one is totally sufficient, if two could be had.
In selecting a companion for life and for eternity,
certainly the most careful planning and thinking
and praying and fasting should be done to be sure
that, of all the decisions, this one must not be wrong.
In true marriage there must be a union of minds
as well as of hearts. Emotions must not wholly
determine decisions, but the mind and the heart,
strengthened by fasting and prayer and serious
consideration, will give one a maximum chance of
marital happiness.
Marriage is not easy; it is not simple, as evidenced
by the ever-mounting divorce rate. Exact figures
astound us. The following ones come from Salt
Lake County [prior to 1976], which are probably
somewhere near average. There were 832 marriages
in a single month, and there were 414 divorces.
That is half as many divorces as marriages. There
were 364 temple marriages, and of the temple
marriages about 10 percent were dissolved by
divorce. This is substantially better than the average,
but we are chagrined that there should be any
divorce following a temple marriage.
We are grateful that this one survey reveals that
about 90 percent of the temple marriages hold fast.
Because of this, we recommend that people marry
those who are of the same racial background
generally, and of somewhat the same economic and
social and educational background (some of those
are not an absolute necessity, but preferred), and
above all, the same religious background, without
question. In spite of the most favorable matings,
the evil one still takes a monumental toll and is the
cause for many broken homes and frustrated lives.
With all conditions as nearly ideal as possible, there
are still people who terminate their marriages for the
reason of “incompatibility.” We see so many shows
and read so much fiction and come in contact with
so many society scandals that the people in general
come to think of “marrying and giving in marriage,”
divorcing and remarrying, as the normal patterns.
The divorce itself does not constitute the entire evil,
but the very acceptance of divorce as a cure is also
a serious sin of this generation. Because a program
or a pattern is universally accepted is not evidence
that it is right. Marriage never was easy. It may
never be. It brings with it sacrifice, sharing, and
a demand for great selflessness.
Many of the TV screen shows and stories of fiction
end with marriage: “They lived happily ever after.”MARRIAGE FORETERNITY 169