It’s Never the Victim’s Fault
In any crime, the predator bears the entire blame.➟ Predators frequently try to make a victim believe that
the abuse was the victim’s fault. If that person feels
stupid, guilty, or ashamed, he or she will be much
less likely to report it.➟ Predators who use emotions to help achieve their
goals — whether their aim is financial or sexual —
often try to convince their victims that the interaction
was something they wanted. People who are lonely or
have low self esteem are particularly susceptible to
this tactic.➟ If you’re victimized online or offline, don’t blame
yourself. Preserve whatever evidence you may have —
e-mails, instant messages, purchases, and so on —
and report the abuse to both the service provider and
your local law enforcement agency. It doesn’t matter
where the criminal says he is, you always report
crimes against you to local law enforcement, and they
will contact other jurisdictions if needed. Your actions
may help to save another person from the heartache
that you’ve experienced.There’s no such thing as consensual sex between
adults and minors. Sexual acts with minors are illegal
and exploitive. As a society, everyone must be commit-
ted to protecting minors — even when the minor acts
against his or her own best interests. Whether you are
a caregiver, grandparent, uncle or aunt, or friend of a
young person, you owe it to the minor to learn how
to protect her. See Chapter 11 for more about how to
do this.332
Part IV: Being Proactive