The Choice

and still feel free inside? You’ve always told me it’s not what’s
happening outside that matters, it’s what’s inside. I’m proud of my
Mexican identity. Why should his bullshit matter to me? Why can’t I
just rise above it?”
It was a beautiful question. Where does our power reside? Is it
enough to ĕnd our inner strength, our inner truth, or does
empowerment also require that we take action on the outside? I do
believe it’s what’s happening inside that matters most. I also believe in
the necessity of living in congruence with our values and ideals—with
our moral selves. I believe in the importance of defending what is right
and defying what is unjust and inhumane. And I believe in choices.
Freedom lies in examining the choices available to us and examining
the consequences of those choices. “e more choices you have,” I
said, “the less you’re going to feel like a victim. Let’s talk about your
choices.”
We made a list. One choice was for Carlos to wear the sombrero
around campus the rest of the day, saying only, “Sí, señor.” He could
agree to submit to whatever other humiliations his pledge master
devised.
Another choice was to object. He could tell the pledge master he
refused to comply.
Or he could withdraw his application to the fraternity. He could put
down the sombrero and the scrub brush and walk away.
Carlos didn’t like the consequences of any of these choices. He
didn’t like the shame and powerlessness he felt in capitulating to a
bully, especially when the humiliations were racist. He felt he couldn’t
continue to play the racist caricature without eroding his self-respect—
if he continued giving in to a bully, he would make the bully stronger
and himself weaker. But outright deĕance of the pledge master could
be physically dangerous and socially isolating. Carlos was afraid of
being assaulted—and of responding in kind. He didn’t want to get