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The Emotional Toll of Premarital Sex


While the physical toll of premarital
sex is more overt (unplanned pregnancy
and sexually transmitted diseases),the
emotional toll is perhaps more dangerous
(several more bullets in the Russian
roulette gun’s chamber).Premarital sex
can subtly start a person down a road
which may have a very tragic ending.
Before proceeding down that road,it is
important to consider some of the
negative consequences of premarital
sexual activity.
A Sexual Double Standard.Thesexual
doublestandardisstillverymuchalive
today.Thiscultural“rule”sayscasualsexis
OKformen,butnotforwomen(Bogle,
2007).Americansdonotstonewomenwho
participateinsexoutsideofmarriage(aswas
doneinbiblicaltimes).However,the


Americanculturestillexcusesmenfor
havingseveralpartners,whilewhispering
badthingsaboutawomanwho“sleeps
around.”Whilethemediatendstopromote
sexualfreedomandequality,unofficiallythe
wordinsmall-townAmericais“boyswillbe
boys,butgirlswillbevirgins.”Thissexual
doublestandardcantakeanemotionaltoll
onwomenwhoareencouragedtohavesex
beforemarriage,butthenfindthemselves
disrespectedfordoingso.
Incompatible Values.Peoplecanhave
entirelydifferentmotivesforparticipating
inpremaritalsex.Forexample,
incompatiblevaluesoccurwhenone
partnerishedonistic,whiletheother
partnerisrelativistic.Thehedonistic
partnerbelievespremaritalsexisjustfor
pleasureandrecreation;therelativistic
partnerbelievesthatpremaritalsexisonly
OKwhenthecoupleisinlove.Hetellsher

Chapter 4


Figure 4.2
Cross-Cultural Comparisons of Teen Sex

Sweden

0 20 40 60 80 100

France

Canada

Great Britain

United States

By age 15
By age 18
By age 20

% of women 20–24 who had sex in their teenage years
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