has made an allegation of verbal abuse against Ms. Sniffle. In New York
City, as previously noted, this must be reported to a central agency with
the power to investigate the matter and determine penalties—up to and in-
cluding dismissal of the teacher. In most cases, as would almost certainly
be the case with Ms. Sniffle, the principal would be directed to investigate
and report back to the Verbal Abuse Unit. Given the legal implications of
this, the assistant principal would not handle the matter—it would go to
the principal. In other school systems with other regulations, this might
not be the case. Let’s see what the school leader would do if she were able
to handle this matter herself.
Once again, she would apologize to the parent—a general apology, not
a specific one that lays the blame on the teacher: “I am sorry your child
was embarrassed. It is my job to train staff in how to respond to students,
and I have not done this well enough. I will try to improve the training of
my teachers so this does not happen again.” And of course, she would pro-
vide Mom with her private phone number. She would make herself avail-
able to Michael if he has any future problem. She would also add that Ms.
Sniffle would be speaking directly to Michael to clear up the situation. In
almost every case, the parent and student will be satisfied with this.
Then, the school leader would move on to the next step and ask Michael
why he has difficulty in class. Does he have a problem hearing? Does he
have difficulty understanding the instruction? Is this subject a problem for
him? Would tutoring help? She would check Michael’s records and speak
to his counselor to determine if he has learning issues in other classes.
She would also speak privately with Ms. Sniffle. While the principal sym-
pathizes with her and understands how she could lose her patience, using the
word stupid in any context with a student is unprofessional and unaccept-
able. She would advise, in the strongest terms, that Ms. Sniffle apologize to
Michael for using the word stupid. The principal understands that this will be
very difficult for Ms. Sniffle to do, for she has found that teachers and even
school leaders rarely feel they should apologize (even though these same
staff members always feel students should apologize to them).
By being a role model in handling problems with students and parents,
the school leader hopes to positively impact the attitude of staff members.
In a district with a regulation on verbal abuse, she would have strong legal
backing in this situation. The teacher, regardless of her personal feelings,
would have no choice but to apologize. In another district without such a
Give the Credit; Take the Blame 47