an intimate relationship with them. This teaching al-
ways seemed old-fashioned to me. Then I read a
book by Joanna Macy in which she recounted being
in India and hearing a Tibetan teach on this subject.
It was so boring that she went outside to get some air.
As she was walking along a path, toward her came an
old woman, bent under a load of wood that she was
carrying on her back. Suddenly she thought, “This
woman was once my mother.” Even though she had
walked past lots of men and women like this in India,
people carrying heavy loads and all bent over so that
you couldn’t even see their faces, she wanted to see
the face of this woman. She wanted to know who this
woman was, because all she could think about was
how this woman had been her mother.
I learned something from Joanna Macy’s story: this
teaching that all sentient beings have been our moth-
ers is about taking an interest in other people, about
being curious, and about being kind. All those name-
less people in the street, they’ve been your lovers,
your brothers and sisters, your fathers and mothers,
your children, your friends. Even if you don’t buy
that, you can just wonder who they are and begin to
look at them with some interest and curiosity. Every-
one is just like us. We all have our lives; we think that
we’re the center of the universe, and none of us is
paying too much attention to anyone else unless
things get very passionate or very aggressive.
***194 High-Stakes Practice