with the enemy—heart to heart—is the only way
that things can change. As long as we hate the
enemy, then we suffer and the enemy suffers and
the world suffers.
The only way to effect real reform is without ha-
tred. This is the message of Martin Luther King, of
Cesar Chavez, of Mother Teresa. Gerald Red Elk—a
close friend and teacher who was a Sioux elder—told
me that as a young man he had been filled with ha-
tred for how his people had been, and continue to be,
treated. Because of his hatred, he was alcoholic and
miserable. But during the Second World War, when
he was in Europe, something in him shifted; he saw
that he was being poisoned by his hatred. He came
back from the war, and for the rest of his life he tried
to bring back the sense of spirit and confidence and
dignity of the young people in his tribe. His main
message was not to hate but to learn to communicate
with all beings. He had a very big mind.
Another slogan says, “All dharma agrees at one
point.” No matter what the teachings are—sha-
matha-vipashyana instruction, lojong instruction,
any instruction of sanity and health from any tradi-
tion of wisdom—the point at which they all agree is
to let go of holding on to yourself. That’s the way of
becoming at home in your world. This is not to say
that ego is sin. Ego is not sin. Ego is not something
that you get rid of. Ego is something that you come to
64 Bringing All That We Meet to the Path