1 0 4cH A Pt eR 5 ■ D e e p A n a l y s i sNot all arguments are serious or good. The following silly argument comes
from a famous scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Reconstruct the
argument that is supposed to show that the woman is a witch.
crowd: We have found a witch. May we burn her?...
woman: I’m not a witch! I’m not a witch!...
Leader: What makes you think she is a witch?
Man #1: She turned me into a newt!
Leader: A newt?
Man #1: I got better.
crowd: Burn her anyway!
Leader: Quiet! Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
crowd: Are there? What are they? Tell us. Do they hurt?
Leader: Tell me, what do you do with witches?
crowd: Burn them!
Leader: And what do you burn apart from witches?
Man #2: More witches!
Man #3: Wood.
Leader: So, why do witches burn?
Man #1: ’Cause they’re made of wood.
Leader: Good!... So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood?
crowd: Build a bridge out of her.
Leader: Ah, but can you not also make bridges out of stone?
crowd: Oh yeah.
Leader: Does wood sink in water?
crowd: No, it floats. Throw her into the pond!
Leader: What also floats in water?
crowd: Bread. Apples. Very small rocks. Cider! Great gravy. Cherries.
Mud. Churches. Lead.
Arthur: A duck!
Leader: Exactly. So, logically, —
Man #3: If she weighs the same as a duck, she’s made of wood.
Leader: And therefore?
crowd: A witch!... A duck. A duck. Here’s a duck!
Leader: We shall use my largest scales.
crowd: Burn the witch! (Woman is placed on scales opposite a duck.)
Leader: Remove the supports. (Woman balances duck.)
crowd: A witch!
woman: It’s a fair cop.exercise Xi97364_ch05_ptg01_079-110.indd 104 15/11/13 9:53 AM
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