© 2003 – Carlos Xuma. – DD Publications – All Rights Reserved –
Unauthorized duplication or distribution is strictly prohibited. Visit http://www.datingdynamics.com for more information.SEXUAL WEIRDNESS...............................................................................................................................
Watch out for the "I Love You"..........................................................................................................
If she says this early on, during sex, be very careful not to reply. This is most likely a part
of her validation mechanism (low self-esteem) coming to the surface. She wants to hear this
from you either to make herself feel loved and therefore worthy, or she needs to hear it to
resolve the cognitive dissonance she has inside – that she needs to be in love to have sex. She
wants to avoid feeling like a "slut." You should just say something along the lines of "You’re so
beautiful" or another appreciation of her. If she pushes you for a return “I love you,” you need to
resist the urge. She may be seeking some kind of commitment from you and this could get
awkward later on. If she stops you and says, "Don’t you love me?" It’s better to tell her "I may in
the future, but right now I’m just happy to be here with you and sharing this." If that’s not good
enough and she stops sex to get you to commit, the option is yours, but don’t be blackmailed
into it because you’re afraid of having sex taken away from you. You got this far with her, you’ll
do it again. You often gain much more respect and confidence from the women you turn down
than the women you accept too easily.
Crying................................................................................................................................................
There’s a joke that one of the sure-fire ways to drive a man away is to cry during or after
sex. Many times it’s just an emotional release for the woman, and she’ll usually just tear up or
cry for a few seconds and be done. If, however, this happens frequently or lasts much longer,
you may have damaged goods on your hands. She may have been abused, or she may have
some significant trauma that is being released during sex. If it happens frequently, watch this
closely – it’s a red flag.
Infrequent Sex...................................................................................................................................
Normal, healthy individuals can have sex regularly without too many issues. If you find
that you are being manipulated through the holding back of sex, or if she has a very
temperamental sex drive, you should seriously consider moving on. (See Appendices.) A hot-
cold sex drive is very inconsistent and it will wreak havoc with your nervous system, making you
miserable. You never want to be in a situation where you feel manipulated by her control over
sex – it’s humiliating. If you have a situation where you just don’t get together very frequently,
sex may just have to be more intermittent for you until you achieve a regular pattern of meeting.
Manage Your Chi ..............................................................................................................................
Chi is the Chinese term for your life energy, and it travels your body in paths, gathering
at certain points. Now, you don’t need to be a mystic, Chi Gong practitioner, or New Age weirdo
to understand or believe in the use of your life force. You feel energy in various parts of your
body all the time. Most people aren’t highly tuned enough to control the flow, or haven’t been
educated about it. There is a great deal of accepted literature on the use of chi in healing and
it’s even being used along side more traditional practices. I encourage you to look into it further,
as it will help you understand your body much better.