grandmothers and grandfathers. Frequently, these
are grandmothers and grandfathers living in the
countryside, while the parents live in cities with the
other children. An insuperable gap in education
and language emerges between these children. A
woman takes this step only in extreme and desper-
ate and dire situations: a divorce, hard material
conditions, or temporary economic difficulties. In
the Soviet period, this often happened when par-
ents have to pursue their education.
Frequently, close relatives assume custody of
children born out of wedlock to their daughters or
sons. Such children are adopted and brought up in
families as younger brothers or sisters. Their real
origin is hidden from relatives.
Among post-Soviet Caucasian peoples and eth-
nic groups with Muslim traditions the question of
adoption in inter-ethnic marriages is more com-
plex. There are cases of mothers being fully sepa-
rated from their children on religious grounds,
where the father has a local nationality (the
Chechens and Daghestans). This is observed in
societies under the strong influence of national and
religious extremism. Mothers in such families are
compelled to migrate to their historical homelands.
Their children are violently taken away from them
and remain in the families of their fathers. Close
relatives are engaged in their education. These chil-
dren are encouraged to have a hostile attitude
toward their biological mothers of a different con-
fession, who allegedly would not accept Islam even
for the sake of children. Mothers of such children
have no opportunity to meet their children for
many years (no statistics available).
Bibliography
A. Chaikovsky, Issik Kul province in 1869–1871 [in
Russian], in Turkistanskiye vedomosti 45 (1872).
Human Rights Watch 13:4(D) (June 2001), Uzbekistan.
N. A. Kislyakov, Essays on the history of family and mar-
riage among the peoples of Central Asia and Kazakh-
stan, Leningrad 1969.
Minnesota Advocates for Human Rights, Domestic
Violence in Uzbekistan, December 2000, <mnadvocates.
org>.
O. Osaulenko, Gender norms of religious and common
law [in Russian], Bishkek 2000.
A. S. Saidov (ed.), Hidàya, vol. II. Tashkent 1998.
Marfua Tokhtakhodjaeva and Almaz KadirovaIran and AfghanistanUnequal divorce and custody rights in Iran and
Afghanistan are the main reasons behind the social
system that places men at the head of the household
and fathers in control of children. In effect, many of
iran and afghanistan 105the gains women secured as citizens have been nul-
lified through family laws that make their freedom
of movement, their desire to work or study, or to
end their marriage subject to the approval of their
husbands. Thus women are rendered subjects
rather than partners of their husbands. While men
have had, by religious convention and law, a uni-
lateral right of divorce, women have had access to
divorce on only very limited grounds and even
then, to prove their case, often have to go to the
unfamiliar and unwelcoming courts. Thus women
must often look to alternative strategies to obtain a
divorce, even assuming they can face the social
stigma and economic hardships.
Although both Afghan and Iranian societies pay
lip service to motherhood, mothers are given few
rights in regard to custody of their children, who
are viewed as belonging to their fathers. The cus-
tody rights of a mother in Iran exist up to the age
of two for boys and seven for girls; while in
Afghanistan among different cultures it can vary
from five to seven years for boys and from five to
puberty for girls. However, these rights are fre-
quently ignored, and even when observed, should
the mother remarry the custody reverts to the
father. Visiting rights of mothers are the grayest
part of Muslim jurisprudence and traditional prac-
tices in both societies. Even where mothers’ visiting
rights are legally recognized, there are no enforce-
ment mechanisms. Frequently, belligerent hus-
bands take away the children in order to punish
their ex-wives. The threat of such eventualities con-
stitutes a disincentive for any wife’s disinclination
to toe the line. Consequently, women may remain
in an unhappy marriage so as not to lose their chil-
dren. In both Iran and Afghanistan many widowed
women feel obliged to accept marrying their broth-
ers-in-law in order not to lose custody of their chil-
dren. Years of war and high male mortality have
brought the lack of custody rights for mothers to
the forefront of Afghan women’s concerns. Inter-
estingly, widows of the Iran-Iraq War (1980–8)
managed to successfully organize and pressure the
Islamic Republic of Iran into changing the law to
allow them to retain custody of their children even
after remarrying. Women hoped the law would
extend to all mothers in Iran although thus far
resistance to such a development has been very
strong.
Historically the male unilateral right of divorce
has wreaked havoc in women’s lives by rendering
them economically and socially vulnerable. The
practice of oral divorce continues to put women in
an uncertain situation. As divorcees, women can
not claim maintenance and yet on occasions women