what we don’t want, and afraid in situations where there is obviously
no danger. Different people respond to the same feelings in differ-
ent ways, which accounts for the unpredictability of human behav-
ior. Witnesses to intensely emotional situations, such as wartime
combat, serious earthquakes, or other disasters, have observed this
phenomenon. In an intensely fearful situation, some people freeze,
others panic and do precisely the wrong thing, while others rise to
the occasion and seem to know exactly what to do.
You can probably think of many examples of people who experi-
enced frustration and anger from a setback. Some lose their tem-
per, yell, scream, and hit things; others withdraw, sulk, and suffer in
silence; still others use the energy that the setback provides to be-
come even more determined—the more positive response. People
also respond to loss in different ways. Loss produces sadness for
everyone, but some people deny the loss and are unwilling to cry
about it; other people spend the rest of their lives in mourning;
while others seem to emerge from a loss in even better condition
than before.
Your opinion about your feelings—whether you judge them to
be good or bad—determines how they effect you. When we judge
feelings—and the energy they produce—to be bad, that energy isn’t
available to us, because we struggle to suppress it. Often we decide
which feelings are acceptable and which ones are not arbitrary, with-
out careful consideration and based solely on habit. Remember,
feelings are neither good nor bad. Good and bad are merely judg-
ments that we make about them. We can compare feelings to elec-
tricity: simply energy, neither good nor bad. We can use electricity to
cook your dinner or to murder a cat. Neither use determines any-
thing about the electricity. The decision as to whether a feeling is ac-
ceptable to you is of paramount importance because it determines
whether you can use the energy for your benefit.
Acceptance of energy brings you into the present moment.
Being in the present moment enables you to deal with the situa-
tion that is producing the energy, usually fear. For example, I
(PL) have fought fires at sea. In such cases, you have two choices:
put the fire out or take your chances abandoning ship. It’s essen-
tial to accept the fear, so that your mind can focus on the opera-
tional aspects of the problem: Where is the next fire
extinguisher? How can I get more water? How do I cool it down?
It’s just about impossible to focus on the solution to the problem
if your mind is distracted by possible future consequences: the124 Stop Wasting Your Energy