246 Part IV: Using Words to Entrance
By completing this exercise you’re examining some of the types of generalisa-
tions that you make (which NLP calls modal operators – as in ‘should’, ‘ought
to’, and ‘have to’ – and universal quantifiers – as in ‘always’ and ‘never’. See
Table 15-1). Then, in step 3, you ask the Meta Model questions to explore
options for yourself. By revising the statements in step 5, you put yourself
back in control of your own decisions and behaviour.
Distortion – that touch of imagination
Disraeli was right when he said, ‘Imagination governs the world.’ Distortion,
the process by which you change the meaning of the experience when it
comes up against your own map of reality, is one such example. Figure 15-4
shows some everyday examples of distortion.
Figure 15-4:
The
language of
distortion.
‘I know you’ll
love this.’
‘You were
good.’ ‘I know she
doesn’t like me.’
‘You must be feeling
absolutely shattered.’ ‘They’re all thinking
that I’m rubbish.’
‘When he does
that, I know
he’s unhappy.’
Distortion supports your ability to explore your own inner world, your
dreams, and lets your imagination run wild. That’s fine when you want to
explore your creativity.
The problem with distortion, however, is that most people don’t realise
that the distortion doesn’t necessarily represent the truth: instead, it just
represents their own perception. For example, have you ever come out of a
meeting with a group of people and all had a different understanding of what
happened? Or been to the cinema or theatre with a group of friends and
come away with a completely different viewpoint about the film’s message
when you chat to your friends about it? Distortion happens when you take
one aspect of an experience and change it according to what’s happening for
you in your life at that time.
