52 The Teen Survival Guide to Dating and Relating
serious relationship, consider dating casually, which means going on dates with
people you’re interested in but not committing to an exclusive relationship yet.
It can be scary to ask someone for a date, no doubt about that. Obviously,
you want the person to say yes—but what if the answer’s no? Will your feelings
be hurt? Probably a little. Will you survive? Absolutely. Keep one thing in mind,
and you’ll get over the disappointment much faster: Don’t waste time longing for
people who don’t want to be in a relationship with you. The best boyfriends/girlfriends
are the ones who like you as much as you like them. Forget about the rest.
Dating offers no guarantees, but you can take steps to make the asking-
out process a little easier. Here are a few tips that may help you get the answer
you want:- Ask someone you know. It’s less stressful to ask out someone you know,
rather than a stranger. If you ask someone you don’t know to go out with you,
the odds of getting a yes are less than if you ask a person who already knows
and likes you. Also, if you don’t know the person you’re going out on a date
with, you might quickly discover that you don’t really have much in common
or enjoy spending time together. Then you’re on a date that can feel awkward
and verrrrrylong. - Get friendly with the person first. There’s nothing wrong with being
attracted to someone you don’t know, but just because the person you like is
“hot” doesn’t automatically mean that he/she would make a fun date or a great
bf/gf. Take the time to get to know a person beforeyou ask him/her out. (This
gives the other person a chance to get to know and feel comfortable with you,
too.) Once the two of you become friendly, or even close friends, you can
decide whether you’re interested in moving into the bf/gf zone. Remember,
people who know and like each other as friends firststand a better chance of
having a healthy romantic relationship than people who don’t know each
other at all. - Take a deep breath and go for it. You can never win if you’re not will-
ing to play the game. Dating is fun (it’s definitely a learning experience), and
it’s a great opportunity to get out in the world and discover what’s important to
you in a relationship. So take the plunge and ask the big question, “Will you go
out with me?”