The Foolish Woman
“The prophet was asked: ‘Which woman is the best?’ He said: ‘the one who
pleases him when he looks at her, who obeys him when he tells her to do
something, and who does not do something he dislikes with regards to herself
and his wealth.” (Iman Ahmad al-Musnad, sahih isnaid )Prophet Solomon taught that the foolish woman destroys her own house.
This woman is the embodiment of ignorance dressed in robes of self-
righteousness. Her mark is excess: she talks too much, gossips, eats too
much, and offers too much to her children causing childhood obesity and
greed (loves too much), and, she certainly minds the business of others too
much. She is the expert 'fault-finder' who cannot leave others in peace as
embodied by the mother-in-law 14 who crosses all borders of Islamic etiquette
and still thinks that heaven lay at her intrusive feet. This woman suffers from
a spiritual poverty that starves her into desperate intervention in the affairs of
others. Her illnesses have no end and no cure, and every one in her
community knows it.
There is yet another type of foolish woman, and this one doubts her
husband’s word even in light of evidence for his good husbandry. This lady
loves her man but feigns submission and often retains undisclosed ulterior
motives for the marriage. She actually listens to and secretly follows the
counsel of others outside her own home. This is a fatal mistake and it is often
made because she falls in love and marries a man from another culture.
Generally speaking her health is maintained, however, she brings down the
walls of her own marital mosque when she does not accept the foundations
Allah has laid as a worldview in her husband’s heart. In other words, she does
not truly accept or submit to his personal vision and destiny.
He will leave her when the day arrives leading to the fulfillment of his destiny,
just as Prophet Lut left his wife. This is because his destiny is often beyond
14
The rights of a mother do not include assuming authority in the house of her children unless
it is delegated by the man of that house, especially that of her son and her son-in-law.
Otherwise, as a man he submits to a woman which is antithetical to the Divine Order.
Furthermore, the subjection of his wife to his mother subverts the wife’s authority over her
own household. This is a form of slavery commonly practiced in the traditional Chinese
family.