to one another is one of the first steps to creating a democratic, liberating dialogue in the
classroom. When students believe that their voices are worth hearing, they will speak loudly
and clearly and more often. This is one of the major goals I have for my classroom and my
students. I want to provide students with a forum that frees them from the restrictions that
bind them and so they can begin telling their own stories. I thank Judy Logan for showing me
how it can be done.
Journal Entry 4: I wondered if everything I had learned was a waste.
When I began student teaching, I believed on faith that experiential learning was the best
way for a student to experience education. I believed that every lesson had to be hands-on
and if I could not find an engaging way to teach something, I was a failure. But as my student
teaching experience progressed, I kept asking myself, “Are my students really learning?” I
constantly wondered if students in an experiential classroom are short-changed. Maybe
these students need a teacher to get up in front of the room and say, “You need to know this
.. .” or “This means this.. .” I began to doubt myself more and more as I heard veteran
teachers refer to experiential classrooms as “cut and paste” classrooms. I wondered if every-
thing I had learned to that point was a waste. When I read John Dewey’sExperience and Edu-
cation, I was relieved to see he was addressing some of my questions. Dewey discusses the
“problem of discovering the connection which actually exists within experience between the
achievements of the past and the issues of the present.”
While Dewey raises points worth considering, his writing was very difficult to get through
and I was left unsatisfied. I was waiting anxiously for him to provide me with the answers.
What I now realize is that experiential learning means that teachers have to come to their
own conclusions based on experiences working with students in their classrooms.
I have begun to notice that different classes need to be taught differently. One of my classes
is filled with an academic mix of “lower than grade-level” and “grade-level” students. This
makes it difficult to aim lessons at everyone. Sometimes I feel as though I am either leaving
some students behind or teaching “down” to the group. I must admit that my expectations are
not as high as with my other classes. If I can get them to read, to understand, and to think criti-
cally from time to time, I feel that I am doing my best. But am I? Sometimes I find myself ac-
cepting “I don’t know” and silence when I know that they are capable of much more.
Recently I did a timeline project with them, and I could tell that they were excited to be
doing something other than reading and discussing the text. If I had realized this at the start,
I would have done a lot of things differently. But I was told early on that it was not in this
“class’s make-up” to participate in open discussions or presentations. More than anyone
else, these students need to have intellectually exciting experiences that provide them with
incentives to attend class and learn. Reading and discussing the textbook does not motivate
them to do anything but wait for the bell to ring.
Journal Entry 5: A pedagogy of hope.
I really cannot relate to Paulo Freire’sPedagogy of Hope. I cannot find the connection be-
tween the types of oppression he talks about and my duty as an educator. This may not be
due to any fault of mine or of Freire’s. It may be, as he suggests, a shortcoming of education
in the United States.
I know this sounds confusing, but it took me a while to disentangle my thoughts so it
might take you a while to make sense of them. Until now, I had absolutely no need to under-
stand ideas like those presented by Freire. They are not part of education in the suburban
schools where I was a student and now student teach. They are not tested on final exams or
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