62 How to Win Every Argument
(It is not quite clear whether the mere child finds this obvious even
before he becomes every schoolboy, or whether he picks it up after a
few lessons.)The fallacy is a special case of the more general fallacy of false
advertisement, which consists of advance praising of your own
views. Since you precede them by the information that they are
known to every schoolboy and obvious to a mere child, you are
scattering roses in their path. The fallacy may be perpetrated no
less effectively by opening with 'Obviously' contentions which
are by no means obvious.
We hold these truths to be self-evident.
(So anyone who doesn't agree must be really stupid.)To use the fallacy effectively, you should never enter an
argument without taking half the kindergarten class along for the
walk. As well as the mere child and every schoolboy, you will
need even a half-wit, albeit a very knowledgeable one. Every
beginner should be in your posse to instruct the experts, and for
sheer range of vision you will need everyone.
'Everyone can see that...'
(Even where no one else but you has such sharp eyes.)When putting across a really controversial point, you might as
well send the whole team into action:
Every schoolboy knows the description of the visitors in Ezekiel; and even
a half-wit realizes that ancient disasters were caused by cosmic dis-
turbances. A mere child could work out that extraterrestrial forces are
involved, so it is obvious to everyone that Earth has been under attack for