2 April 10, 2022The Sunday Times
Travel
H
ow do Brits love their dogs?
Let me count the ways.
There’s Crufts, a national
institution and the world’s
largest dog show. There
are the Queen’s corgis, below, national
treasures and some of the royal family’s
least controversial members. There are
No 10-authorised Afghanistan airlifts.
There’s our penchant for brands
advertised by sheepdogs and puppies
(Dulux and Andrex; sounds as
though Durex should join in,
but thankfully it doesn’t).
And just when you
thought a nation couldn’t
get more dog-obsessed,
along comes a pandemic
that prompts mutt-free
households to convert.
Which is fine, of course.
Except that hotels and pubs
have increasingly realised the
appeal of chasing the hound
pound (not “the dog pound”, that’s
something else). Which would also be
fine, if it weren’t for the places that are
happier to welcome a moulting, drooling
dog than a cheery child who knows how
to sit still. It’s infuriating — they’re putting
Gnashers before nippers.
Maybe it has something to do with this
week’s news that dogs have evolved
muscles that allow them to adopt
plaintive facial expressions — all the better
to manipulate you with, my dear.
I’m not one of those parents who insist
that their child is their best friend, but nor
do I think man’s best friend should come
first. I’ve lost count of the lovely looking
UK hotels I’ve eyed up for a family break,
only to have to abandon my booking
when I discover that under-12s aren’t
allowed. I’d be surprised if anywhere
near as many hotels ban dogs.
It’s not just the ones with outright
no-kids policies, either — there are the
ones that shout about their dog-friendly
credentials but discourage children by
omission, neglecting to spell out online
or in brochures whether little ’uns might
be accommodated. Even places that allow
both might charge you a tenner for
sharing your room with a dog but three
times that to share with a child. You might
think that had to do with laundry costs,
but muddy paw prints don’t clean
themselves up.
I’m not arguing for every hospitality
business to fling its arms open to children.
Sometimes you don’t want them to be
seen or heard, especially when you’re
related to them. But the same should go
for dogs, and it often doesn’t feel like that
— something else I have lost count of arethe missives that hit my inbox proclaiming
some new canine enticement: hotels that
offer designer tweed dog beds and facials
(the action formerly known as “stroking”);
pet concierges; animal-specific menus or
treats cooked by celebrity chefs. This is all
lovely for dogs, but can be dangerous for
human guests. Last week, at a hotel with
a particularly inviting breakfast buffet, I
nearly helped myself from the Kilner jar
of doggie treats sitting temptingly among
the pastries.
There are, of course, some horribly
behaved children who definitely shouldn’t
be allowed anywhere near hotels where
adults have paid good money to relax
(possibly by leaving their own children
elsewhere). But there are plenty of
naughty dogs too. Kids and puppies
alike need house-training, and those
parents and owners who ignore
their charges when they
shriek, bark and treat sofas
like trampolines or
scratching posts do no
one any favours.
The difference is that
while the Baroness
Bombursts of this world
might claim to be allergic
to children, they need only
to crack out the smelling salts,
not antihistamines. What are
those with genuine allergies
supposed to do — stay at home? Besides,
you don’t have to be sensitive to pet hair
to object to finding it on your duvet.
As if all that wasn’t bad enough,
consider for a minute the onslaught of
dog portmanteau words that have been
unleashed on an unsuspecting public:
dog-cation; ap-pet-iser; puppuccino;
pawsecco — someone make it stop.There are hotels that recognise the
importance of welcoming children and
dogs (or at least the cost and
complications of finding sitters). It’s a
tricky balancing act, but they show that
with a bit of humour, empathy and canny
thinking, it is possible to avoid alienating
anyone and still cater to canines and
under-nines.
And perhaps when more businesses
have grasped that idea, kitted themselves
out with dog baskets and crayons and
quiet spaces, they might move on to
making it easier for humans with mobility
issues. Lay on all the posh dog chews you
like, but one wheelchair-accessible room
out of dozens seems rather... token. It’s
enough to drive you barking mad.Do you prefer your hotels dog-free or
child-free? Email us at travel@sunday-
times.co.uk for your chance to win a
£1,000 Oliver’s Travels voucherDOGS GET
ALL THE
TREATS
AT HOTELS
LIZ
EDWARDSAssistant Travel EditorSome places are happier to
welcome a dog than a childT
LETTER OF THE WEEK
We had planned to walk the Camino
Portugues from Tui to Santiago for my
70th birthday in May 2020 (“The quiet
camino”, last week). Because of Covid,
we finally made it last September. Paq
Mochila, the Spanish post office’s courier
service, transported our bags from one
stop-off to the next. There are so many
memories — the aromatic wild mint along
the waysides; the albariño-grape grower
who wanted to chat for ever; soaking our
weary feet in the hot springs at Caldas
de Reis. But I would advise against that
17-mile walk on the last day. We stayed
overnight at the excellent Casa Rural das
Bentinas in Milladoiro, about four miles
from Santiago de Compostela. The next
morning we set off refreshed and reached
our destination early, in fine fettle to
explore its historic centre.
Joy Davies, CardiffI am inspired after reading James
Stewart’s piece. I loved the film The Way,
and a pilgrimage of gentle self-discovery
has long been on the cards. I look
forward to following in James’s footsteps
through the countryside of the Variante
Espiritual. Thank you.
Sheila Brodie, Scottish BordersLOST CAUSES
Rebecca Lowe’s tale of parental panic
echoed our family’s reaction to our
yearlong London-to-Cape Town journey
in the 1980s (“Get on your bike and ride”,
last week). We also ignored all advice
against going and felt ill-prepared when
we arrived. Driving an old Dutch police
van across the Sahara was the first of
many times we asked ourselves if they’d
been right. Our aerogrammes often went
missing — and so, everyone thought, had
we. Newly married, we wondered if the
trip would make or break us; 40 years
on we’re going back to do it all again.
Chris MacDonald, BerkshirePLAIN SAILING
You recommended travelling via
Dover and Calais with Irish Ferries to
visit the Netherlands (“20 fabulous ferry
breaks”, last week). There is also a
regular overnight route with DFDS from
Newcastle (North Shields) to Amsterdam
— a lot more convenient for anyone living
in the north of England or Scotland. I
have used this route many times to travel
onward through Germany then Denmark,
taking another ferry there from Hirtshals
to Stavanger in Norway. You are correct,
ferry journeys are a great way to travel.
Ken Hardy, via emailGo to Shetland — it is fabulous in
summer and spectacular in winter. There
are orcas, humpback whales, kayaking,
trips on traditional sailing boats, fishing,
diving, birdwatching, photography,Travel
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