7 Young Adulthood 199positive or negative, women underwent changes of appearance, which
required adjustment.
Changes to self-image were also internal. In some cases, diversion and
treatment caused women to change their thinking about past activities. Some
began to think of their past exchanges of companionship and sex for shelter
or security as “prostitution.” Recategorization of these activities, while likely
motivated by a desire to encourage women to desist from prostitution, may
deepen women’s shame. Nicole noted that she still engages in prostitution
when necessary and she now feels worse about doing so.
Even though I was terminated, a lot of what I learned stuck with me.
I mean I still sell (sex) ‘cause it’s hard to get a job out here sometimes,
and you just kind of revert back to what you know. But it’s never the
same after that.... It’s like it’s easy to do because it’s like you’ve gone
from, it’s like a football player and football. You know how to play
football. But it’s not easy in the sense, you’ve done all that work (with
the therapy programs). And it’s like once I started doing that work, it
changed it.Prostitute women share narratives that describe themselves as moral
beings (Shdaimah & Leon, 2014, in press). Seeing themselves devoid of legal
opportunities to earn income, they choose prostitution; they elect possible
harm themselves over other options that they view as more harmful to others,
such as stealing from families or strangers, selling drugs, or home invasion.
Feelings of stigma, shame, or a heightened sense of being immoral come with
new narratives of prostitution that are created with the input of criminal justice
programs that construct prostitution as illegal, offensive, and immoral. These
may damage self-images that women have constructed that include a different
universe of reference, and reviewing themselves through this lens constitutes
a loss. They may lose a protective edge that is necessary for survival where
women have few economic or social opportunities. Further limited by health
problems and criminal records, this loss may leave women vulnerable when
they leave the criminal justice system (McCorkel, 2013).
Similarly, in court and in treatment, PDC participants revisit aspects of
their past that are connected to prostitution and drug use. Women frequently
discuss lost years with family members and lost career and educational
opportunities. Childhood and adult traumas (such as Nicole’s molestation)
are revisited in therapy stimulating feelings of loss and mourning.
Practice and Policy Implications
We often fail to recognize that cessation of socially stigmatized (and illegal)
activities may be experienced as a loss. Even people who feel satisfied and
proud and experience these changes as an accomplishment, may grieve certain
aspects of their life changes.* One of the recommendations for practice with
*See also Sharon Oselin (2014) on the process of role distancing and the formation of
new identities among prostitute women.