289
ELEVEN
Conclusions
We began with the premise that the destabilizing force of loss is an inevitable
part of human existence and lies at the heart of life and growth. We also rec-
ognized that some grievers mourn for the rest of their lives and do not neces-
sarily grow from loss. Still, research and clinical experience reassure us that
most individuals cope with the distress of loss and learn lessons of empathy
and resilience along with knowledge of their ability to survive deep pain. We
believe that people can process loss more readily when they talk with someone
who is supportive, calm, and nonjudgmental. We hope that by reflecting on
the ideas and information in this text, the reader feels more competent to help
in this way.
Some readers may find our view of maturational losses to be over-
reaching in seemingly asserting that loss is around every developmental cor-
ner. Although we do believe that all change involves loss, we do not hold that
all maturational losses must be actively mourned. Simply, they deserve recog-
nition as destabilizing and potentially growth-producing events. When people
recognize the great or small losses that affect them, they are better able to rec-
ognize how irritation, sadness, hypervigilance, or other emotions are related
to the loss and to cope more effectively because they recognize the source.
In this chapter, we review the conceptual underpinnings of the newer
grief theories we introduced in the first chapter. We believe these concepts
provide guidance for the important work to be done with grievers. We sin-
cerely hope that this text has helped the reader feel confident in their ability to
accompany grievers in their journey through grief.
Objectives
After reading this chapter the reader will be able to:
■ Synthesize literature about postmodern grief theory.
■ Understand how maturational losses fit within the concept of disenfran-
chised grief concepts.
■ Be aware of the intersections of trauma and grief theory.
■ Deliberate about changes in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental
Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) related to diagnosis and grief.
■ Identify forms of self-care that support good practice.
