230 Two Politeness Parentheticals
If I may say so is generally not treated in dictionaries, but English- idioms-
and- expressions.com (s.v. “If I may say so”) notes that it is “a nice way of
expressing your opinion, even if no one is asking for it. It sounds as if you’re
asking someone’s permission to do so (although you’re not ...) and makes your
unsolicited advice sound less offensive.”
Both expressions serve an epistemic or hedging function in “softening”
or undercutting to some degree the strength of the utterance (‘this is just my
personal opinion, it may not be universally accepted’). The epistemic doubt
expressed by these expressions may be reinforced by an epistemic marker ( I
think , probably ) or by a pragmatic marker expressing epistemic uncertainty
( well , I mean , kind of ):
(2) a. which is probably , if I may say so , a better route to have followed. (1996
Heenan, Legal aspects of human resources in the Canada/ U.S. context
[COCA])
b. And I think partly, if I may say so , that’s the effect of television, (CNN
CapGang [COCA])
c. Well , for what it’s worth , learning an instrument at your age is diffi cult,
(2009 NPR FreshAir [COCA])
d. For what it’s worth , April is supposedly the driest month and May and June,
the sunniest, (1994 Bicycling [COCA])
e. Well , I think his argument was a bit tendentious if I may say so (2003 PBS_
Newshour [COCA])
f. I mean , for what it ’ s worth , I- I kind of like Salem. (2008 DAYS [SOAP])
In addition to accompanying an expression of speaker opinion, these comment
clauses may be used in other contexts in which the hearer’s negative face is
threatened, e.g., when the speaker is suggesting a course of action the hearer
should or should not take (3), when suggesting what point of view the hearer
should take (4), and when pointing out something the hearer might not expect
or think (5):
(3) a. If I may say so , Bob, I wouldn’t give them too much credit for this. (1990
CNN NewsSun [COCA])
b. Well, the major thing now, Mr. President, if I may say so , is to protect the
presidency and your authority. (1997 ABC Nightline [COCA])
c. I think it’s the job of the press, if I may say so , to ask the serious questions.
(1999 Fox_ Zahn [COCA])
d. If I may say so – it would be good for you to get out, Sir – (2007 OLTL
[SOAP])
e. But for what it ’ s worth , I kind of was hoping you’d stick around. (2011
AMC [SOAP])
f. for what it ’ s worth , yelling and throwing things aren’t going to make them
listen. (2003 GH [SOAP])