Christine
I was 19 when I first met Patrick. We kept it casual for
a while, but he really made me laugh. We’ve been
together 15 years now and we’re about to celebrate our
11th wedding anniversary. The secret? Separate Sky
boxes and separate bathrooms!
My mum raised my brother, sister and me on her own,
which was difficult. I thought if I ever had children
I wanted a strong family unit with a mummy and daddy.
When our twins — Penelope and Leo — arrived in 2013
it was a dream come true. We didn’t initially worry about
their development because all children do things at
different times. Weaning them was very difficult, but we
just thought they were a bit fussy. Later we learnt that
food sensory issues are common with people who have
autism. But gradually there were more things we noticed
in the twins. Their lack of eye contact and expression in
their faces, being very sensitive to lights, sounds and
noise. If the doorbell rang they would scream.
It didn’t start to fall into place until we were looking
at nurseries and realised there was a huge gap in their
development compared with other children. They were
completely nonverbal until they were four. So we
started on speech therapy for them, but we didn’t realise
they were on the path to being diagnosed with autism.
It came as a big shock on the day in 2017 that their
paediatrician sat us down and told us, “We’ve done
an Ados [autism diagnostic observation schedule]
assessment; Leo and Penelope are autistic.” By then
we’d not long had our youngest, Felicity [born in 2016],
and we spotted all the same signs in her. It was a lot
easier to get her diagnosis as we knew what we needed
to highlight — not all GPs are familiar with autism and
some have very outdated views on it.
When I was diagnosed myself last year I realised I’d
always been the same as the children. I’d be sitting in
their play therapy appointments and I’d be encouraged
to touch various sensory items to encourage the kids
and I’d recoil. There was a reason I’d had trouble
making friends growing up. I left school early as I
couldn’t cope with how busy it was and had always
been very particular about certain things. Suddenly
everything fell into place. It was a huge relief for me.
The children and I all eat very plain, noncolourful
food. However, they are beginning to try more things
now. When Leo was seven we celebrated when he ate a
chicken nugget — it was the first time he’d eaten meat.
Patrick and I have needed a lot of patience with the
children. In our house we do things in our own time
and that’s just how it has to be. But we’re lucky that
we’re both very laid-back. Patrick was especially
brilliant when I was diagnosed; he’s always there for me.
RELATIVE VALUES
Paddy and Christine McGuinness
The TV presenter and his wife on bringing up three autistic children
Fear of the unknown can cause me a lot of anxiety. For
instance if Patrick and I get invited to a red-carpet event
it’s a real honour, but inside I’m a ball of nervousness.
For years I used to send Patrick off on his own. Now I’m
at the point where I can enjoy social occasions, I just
need to check lots of seemingly minuscule details as
a way of getting rid of my nervous energy.
Laughter is literally what’s got us through the difficult
times; sometimes all you can do is laugh because of how
awful it is. We alternate who works, so there’s always one
of us at home. Our home is the children’s safety zone,
where they can have a meltdown if that’s what they need.
The love I feel from my children is unconditional.
I feel very blessed. It’s stressful; I’ve been up since 5am
today with two of them. But Patrick and I are so proud
of them, and we’ve come through it together stronger.Paddy
I was 34 and flitting between things when I met
Christine. I’d just done Max and Paddy with my mate
Peter [Kay], Phoenix Nights, and had just finished a
two-year tour of the UK. Despite my onstage presence,
I’ve always been a bit of a coward when it came to
talking to girls. So when I saw Christine at an event
I got a mutual friend of ours to go over for me.Main: Christine,
34, and Paddy, 48,
say laughter has
kept them going
through tough
times. Right: on
their wedding day
in June 2011“When I was diagnosed last year,
I realised I’d been the same as the
children. Everything fell into place”
8 • The Sunday Times Magazine