Sociology Now, Census Update

and a woman. In ancient Greece, bonds of affection between soldiers were praised, and

older men commonly sought out mentoring and sexual relationships with young men.

In medieval Persia, poets who wanted to describe God’s love for humanity used the

metaphor of the male lover and his male beloved. In these cultures, men were still

expected to marry women and have children, and most did. The boundaries for accept-

able sexual conduct did not end at their marriage and family relations.

Perhaps the most interesting example of institutionalized same-sex behavior

occurs among the Sambia of New Guinea, where all older men of the community are

required to spend several years in ongoing sexual relationships with young men who

are just reaching puberty. According to tribal myth, same-sex behavior is a physio-

logical necessity—without it, the boy will not mature into adulthood. And, as tribal

elders point out, it works—every boy engaging in same-sex behavior becomes a man.

The male elders expressed shock and surprise when anthropologist Gilbert Herdt

asked them if they were homosexual. Not at all, they said. The boys need to become

men so they can marry and have children (Herdt, 1983).

Sexual Identities

Norms about sexual behavior govern not only our sexual conduct but also how we

develop a sexual identity. Our sexual identities cohere around a preference—for a type

of person or a specific behavior. These preferences are more flexible than we typically

think. We may feel that our preferences are fixed, inflexible, and polar opposites. But

in reality, each of us finds ourselves on a continuum of preferences and behaviors.

Take, for example, sadomasochism or S/M. While this preference for specific

behaviors is often understood as “deviant” sexual behavior, most Americans have expe-

rienced erotic stimulation of some kind from either inflicting or receiving pain (biting,

scratching, slapping). Some percentage will find that they like that experience so much

that they want to do it again, and a smaller percentage will actually incorporate it into

320 CHAPTER 10SEXUALITY

Extramarital Sex

One of the main tenets of the institution of marriage is fidelity. Marriage, currently limited in

most of the United States to heterosexuals, is based on monogamy. In our culture, divorce has

become so rampant that some say what we actually practice is serial monogamy, where individu-

als are monogamous in a series of relationships. Still, one of the main reasons cited for divorce

is adultery, or extramarital sex. The phenomena of open marriages and polyamory are gaining

wider, although not widespread, acceptance. So, what do you think?

10.1

What

do

you

think

?

How wrong do you think it is to have sex with a person other than one’s spouse?

❍Always wrong

❍Almost always wrong

❍Sometimes wrong

❍Never wrong

See the back of the chapter to compare your answers to national survey data.