Four Four Two - UK (2022-06)

(Maropa) #1
AROUnD THE
GROUnDS

XI
BEST: Phil Whitehead, Matt Elliott, Dave
Langan, Bobby McDonald, Gary Briggs,
Trevor Hebberd, Ray Houghton, Joey
Beauchamp, George Lawrence, Kemar
Roofe, John Aldridge.
WORST: Mike Salmon, Dwight Tiendalli,
Ben Futcher, Lee Jarman, Peter Fear,
Arthur Gnohere, Isaac Buckley-Ricketts,
Courtney Pitt, Juan Pablo Raponi, Jamie
Slabber, Steve Anthrobus.


PLAYER
B: Beauchamp [right] only wanted to
play for his hometown club, despite
being good enough to play for his
country. A magician on the wing
and a true U’s icon. Gone too soon.
W: Anthrobus – big targetman with
a big dedication to goal droughts.
Sixty-nine games, four goals. The
first name on the teamsheet... if
it’s written in alphabetical order.


GAME
B: November 1985 against Ipswich at
the Manor Ground. Early in the second
half we’re 3-0 down, but from nowhere
we surge down the slope towards the
London Road end, battering our way to
a late victory. Aldridge gets a hat-trick.
W: A 7-1 stuffing by Birmingham in ’98.
We’d beaten them 1-0 away a month
before, wore Christmas hats during the
warm-up and made them very angry.
On-loan goalkeeper Salmon was sent
straight back to Charlton.


SEASOn
B: 2015-16 had everything: derby wins,
giant-killings, a cup final at Wembley
and automatic promotion. We had an
exciting side, most of whom have since
played in the Championship or above.


W: 2000-01: won seven, drew six, lost
33, conceded 100 goals. We let in three
or more on 22 occasions, and had four
managers and five keepers – including
one called Hubert Busby Junior.

SIGnI n G
B: Kemar Roofe [below]. Suddenly, we
had a forward capable of playing at
the highest level in League Two. He
transcended an already brilliant
team, scoring 26 goals in our
2015-16 promotion season.
W: Brian Wilsterman was
a popular but inept Dutch
defender, and our eighth-
most expensive signing.
Well known for his big

smile... probably because he also didn’t
know how he was getting away with it.

n ICKnAME
B: Ron Atkinson holds the club record
for appearances (560) and was known
as ‘The Tank’.
W: The club nickname is ‘The U’s’ – it’s
awful, generic and meaningless. Plus, it
has an apostrophe in the wrong place.

GOAL
B: Beauchamp against Blackpool, 1996.
With 20 minutes to go, the ball broke
to Joey and he looped in a cracker
from at least 30 yards. It’s the best
goal anyone in the Manor Ground
that day has ever seen.
W: The winning penalty in
2007’s Conference play-
off semi-final defeat to

Exeter. One season was enough at
that level, but it seemed like we’d
be in non-league forever.

CULT HERO
B: Ricardinho [left] – everyone loved
the Brazilian full-back in a miserable
2017-18 season, even when he got
a straight red for the ultimate ‘he’s
just not that kind of player’ challenge
which nearly cut his opponent in half.
W: Latvian striker Kristaps Grebis, who
later appeared in Champions League
qualifiers... possibly on the turnstiles.

CHAnT
B: I loved the tribute to Dave Savage
which was sung to the Steptoe and
Son theme. It didn’t scan, rhyme or
have any cute wordplay, and nobody
knew why we sang it.
W: Any opposition chant referring to
our three-sided ground. It’s been 20
years – we know.

AWAY TRIP
B: Wycombe: looks like a derby, feels
like one, smells like one... but isn’t one.
W: Fleetwood is so far away – we’ve
played there seven times and drawn
twice. One point for every 714 miles
travelled. Plus, why is it so far away?

FACIAL HAIR
B: Keeper Roy Burton had a fantastic
moustache but was more famous for
his shorts falling down, revealing his
equally hairy backside when he took
goal-kicks. Sometimes it was hard to
know which way he was facing...
W: Aldridge shaved off his moustache
for the 1986 Milk Cup Final victory over
QPR [above left] – it completely ruined
the whole day for me.

BEST&WORST


Scott Walkinshaw, aka Oxblogger, on Beauchamp brilliance, Aldridge atrocities... and hairy-arsed keepers


OXFORD UnITED


86 June 2022 FourFourTwo

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