108 http://www.yachtingmonthly.com MARCH 2016
THE CONFESSIONAL
OWN UP TO YOUR SAILING SINS
The confession of the
month wins a floating
Standard Horizon
handheld VHF radio worth £140
PLUS an original Bill Caldwell cartoon
WIN
of it, we could retrieve it later. Or
so I thought. Suddenly a group of
terns spotted their next meal and
started to dive-bomb my splint.
Fortunately they realised it was
not food but the commotion
attracted a less intelligent juvenile
seagull. In just one swoop he had
my splint fi rmly in his beak and
disappeared downriver.
The next day I had to report to
the hospital that my splint had
been stolen – by a seagull.The alarm
didn’t go off
By Julian Wolfram
Sailing in the Scottish Peaks Race one year,
we had just dropped our runners off at
Lamlash for them to go up Goat Fell. A nasty
swell was rolling into the anchorage so we
decided to go across to the Holy Isle shore
about half a mile away for some shelter.
Having dropped the anchor and turned off
the VHF radio, we set the alarm on the ship’s
clock for two hours hence and turned in for
a short kip before the fi nal leg of the race
to Troon. Fortunately one of the crew woke
and checked his watch – it was 0100. We had
slept for over three hours! The ship’s clock
had stopped at 1130 and there had been no
alarm at midnight as I’d forgotten to replace
battery at the beginning of the season.
We rushed over to Lamlash and picked
up two tired, very cold and irate fell runners
who had been waiting for 45 minutes for our
dinghy to pick them up. They went straight
to their bunks without a word and didn’t
emerge until after we safely tied up in Troon.POST Confessions,
Yachting Monthly,
Blue Fin Building,
110 Southwark Street,
London SE1 0SU
EMAIL
[email protected]
Please send us your confessions
in less than 200 wordsLock up your mothers
CONFESSION OF THE MONTH
By Sam Johnston
I was going sailing with old friends
on a three-day venture in the
Channel. As we were starting from
the Hamble, I had to travel up from
Devon after work in time for an
early departure the next morning.
I caught the overnight train and
made good my estimated arrival
time, with four and half hours to
spare. The skipper had previously
phoned and said he would leave the
jetty light on for me so I could fi nd the
boat. I should just fi nd a space on
board to crash and he would see me
at breakfast.
After a tiring day at work followed
by a long journey I was exhausted to say the
least, so with the aid of the jetty light I got
myself aboard. The saloon seemed to be
spoken for but the after cabin had a double
berth with only one snoring mariner and
plenty of room for me to crash, which I duly
did without waking anyone. Bliss!
Much later I was awakened by voices and a
young man came into the cabin with a cup of
tea. I had never met him before and he looked
more than a little startled, not least because I
had been sleeping, as it transpired, next to his
still-dozing mother.
Bleary-eyed, she inquired of her son, ‘Am I
missing something darling?’ before she turned
to me and our eyes met for the fi rst time.
Yes! Wrong bed, wrong boat, wrong jetty!
Still, she was very understanding and I was on
the correct vessel in a very short amount of
time. I said not a word to my skipper or crew
and they all assumed I had just arrived.
Stiff-necked gull
By Jim Stott
One recent Sunday morning we slipped our
mooring on the Beaulieu River for a day on
the Solent aboard our Dufour 40 Azygos.
It was going to be a day of relaxation for
me after breaking my right index fi nger ten
days earlier. The bone was pinned and the
fi nger reinforced with a plastic splint held in
place by Velcro.
After a most enjoyable potter afl oat, we
returned to our mooring and called the club
bosun for a ferry ashore. Feeling guilty for
not pulling my weight I tied the fender step
to the port gate stanchions, ready to board
the water taxi. In the process my splint came
loose and was lost overboard. It fl oated away
on the tide.
I was not worried as the bosun would
arrive soon and, providing I didn’t lose sight8LI/M[MTVST *IEXLIVMRK 4VSTIPPIV
GBTUFSTBJMJOHrQPXFSGVMNPUPSJOHrPVUTUBOEJOHSFWFSTF
TUBJOMFTTTUFFMCPTTrBEKVTUBCMFQJUDIr[FSPCMBEFDPSSPTJPO
,mCMBEF,JXJQSPQrUPIQFOHJOFTr"MMTJ[FTb 7"5
5IFOFX,mCMBEF,JXJQSPQr6QUPIQFOHJOFTr"MMTJ[FTb 7"5
7&$5"."3*/&r5FM
rXXXWFDUBNBSJOFDPNrTBMFT!WFDUBNBSJOFDPN