Empire UK

123

LIKE

THIS

WATCH

THIS

SKY CAPTAIN

AND THE

WORLD OF

TOMORROW

2004

The fi lm that was

almost called

Tomorrowworld (not

really) is an equally

bright-and-breezy

robot-packed

adventure in which

reporter Polly Perkins

(Gwyneth Paltrow)

goes on the trail of a

mysterious inventor.

steampunk rocket that was hidden all
along in the Eiff el Tower — where we
don’t get enough time to appreciate the
poignantly abandoned city of the future
as Nix (Hugh Laurie) delivers a lecture
about how annoyingly despairing we are.
Full marks for addressing the
now-retro nature of Tomorrowland
and building a storyline around the
disappointment we all feel that the
future we’re living in has more global
warming and rioting than jet-packs and
monorails. However tons of gosh-wow
ideas gadgets and mind-stretching
concepts are strung onto a basic chase
format which might as well be Race To
Witch Mountain 2. The sincere yet
plastic-rainbow vision of the way out of
our fi x takes in a ridiculous MacGuffi n
bomb (why put a high-explosive
self-destruct mechanism in anything?)

blowing up a big evil other-dimensional

gadget and the recruitment of a new

generation of wake-up-in-the-wheatfi eld

Imagineers to rescue that gleaming

future city from the wastelands of

alternative reality.

Salted throughout are glimpses of

video games books (1984) and movies

(Toxic Cosmos 3) that represent the

dystopias audiences have treacherously

embraced when they should have been

watching reruns of The Cat From Outer

Space (this spectacularly misunderstands

the point of dystopian fi ction probably

deliberately). There’s insight here but it

comes across as grumpiness: especially

since the presumable corollary is that

the box-offi ce underperformance of

Tomorrowland alongside the success

of Mad Max: Fury Road means we’re

all doomed. KIM NEWMAN

John Wick

★★★★

FROM SEPTEMBER 21 / CERT. 15

➞ Every so often Keanu Reeves

stars in something bloody brilliant.

The emphasis is fi rmly on “bloody”

here as his retired hitman gets

revenge following the murder of his

dog. Pleasing genre tweaks a rich

mythology and an enormous

bodycount make this an insanely

enjoyable slice of ultra-violence. HOH

San Andreas

★★

FROM OCTOBER 12 / CERT. 12

➞ Those secretly hoping this

would be The Rock vs. the planet

will be disappointed. Dwayne

Johnson’s rescue pilot ignores the

general devastation after a Californian

super-quake focusing instead on

a tired save-the-family plot. There are

fun moments but you’ll wish he actually

punched the Earth into next week. HOH

Hot Tub Time Machine 2

★

FROM NOW / CERT. 15

➞ This sequel is the cinematic

equivalent of a fart in a jacuzzi. John

Cusack has fl ed the franchise but that

doesn’t stop our heroes from romping

charmlessly around the year 2025 and

inevitably walking towards the camera

interminably while rap music plays.

The original’s ingenuity is replaced by

dicks-being-shot-off gags. NDS

ALSO OUT