As anyone with a TV knows, Goldblum has another Australian
connection beyond the Hemsworth family. In 2009, Channel Nine
host Richard Wilkins announced live on air that the actor had died.
“I have a report in front of me,” Wilkins said, looking startled, “New
Zealand police are saying that Jeff Goldblum fell from a cliff to his
death.” The news was especially grim, given it happened the same day
both Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett died. Except it wasn’t true.
Goldblum has never even been to New Zealand.
“I saw him and we discussed the whole thing,” says Goldblum,
sounding weary of talking about the incident. “He apologised and
I said there’s no need, that it could happen to anybody. He gave me
an inscribed copy of his book that I enjoyed.
“I’d like to go to New Zealand,” he adds. “But I wouldn’t like to
fall off a cliff there. Though I don’t think I’d like to die in any way,
particularly – off the top of my head, I don’t think there’s anything
that sounds good. But it’s going to happen, as we know.”
On November 8, last year, Goldblum appeared on The Late
Show With Stephen Colbert. He’d spent the previous months in the
midst of a new role, that of political campaigner, hitting the road
with the hope of seeing Hillary Clinton become America’s first
female president. Instead, he was a guest on a special edition of
Colbert’s show just as Donald Trump became president-elect
of the United States.
The footage of the event is hard to watch. Goldblum walks on the
set and Colbert greets him with a hug. “Jeff, I have a card here that
says I have questions for you. But I’ll be frank,” Colbert says, placing
it on his desk. “I just wanna know how you feel right now.”
Goldblum doesn’t look like he feels very good at all. He nurses
the top of his left ear and struggles to find the first sentence of his
response. “Yes, yes,” he starts, the way someone might reply if they’d
been floored by a punch and were trying to reassure people they’re
OK. “I’ve watched for, you know, the whole time. I’ve put in... hours.”
He looks dazed. As if he’s moving in slow motion.
“I was looking at all the polls and I thought this was going to be
fun,” Goldblum says now. “So, sure enough, I was on the show as we
were getting the news. It was a unique and painful kind of challenge.
It’s tough, but we’ll see how we come out of all this.”
Goldblum has never met Trump and hadn’t paid much attention
to the flamboyant New Yorker, until he made the transition from TV
star to political candidate. “I did not watch his show, nor have I ever
found any interest in him,” he says. “I averted my eyes – it’s not
snobbishness, strictly, but it was just not my cup of tea.”
More than a year on, the election is still raw. “I’m no expert, but
my sense was that at the time, she was very well prepared,” he says of
Clinton. “I think there’s more subterranean and long-held misogyny
than we talk about.”
Further complicating matters is the fact that Goldblum is now
raising two young children in this, the Trump era. His second son,
River Joe, was born in April.
“I’m not entirely unhappy that I had kids and brought them into
this story – but it makes you think about it more,” he admits. “As we
know, the human species has entered a new chapter, where we can
now destroy ourselves with this technology,” he says, meaning
nuclear weapons.
“That’s a real thing. And the people involved in the highest levels of
politics need to be the best our species has to offer. So it frightens me
we don’t have that. I hope we make it through because any day could
be a very bad day – and we could bring that upon ourselves.”
It’s hard not to take him seriously. After all, many of Goldblum’s
finest moments are those where he’s announcing existential dangers
to mankind – the aliens in Independence Day, the dinosaurs of Jurassic
Park. You can’t help feeling that if this were a movie, we might look
back and wish we’d heeded his warnings, before the credits start to roll.
“How’d I do?” Goldblum asks, when it’s time to wrap up. We’ve
only had tap water but he leaves a fresh $20 bill for the staff.
They all know him here.
The Chateau Marmont isn’t the fanciest hotel in LA. Not even close.
But it’s weird and wonderful in a way that makes you think the reason
it’s lasted so long is not because of how many stars it has, but because it
has soul; a personality that sets it apart. All the great ones do. n202 GQ.COM.AU MEN OF THE YEAR 2017