http://www.boatinternational.com | January 2018OWNERS ANONYMOUS
Stiletto damage, drug abuse, propositioning
the crew... hosts reveal the transgressions that
lefttheperpetratorsstruckofftheguestlist–
and give praise for good behaviourMind the gap
The yacht was under anchor in the bay and we
had enjoyed a relaxing lunch ashore. An elderly
guest, fully clad in a British expat cream suit,
shirt and tie, accepted a ride back to the yacht
on a pedalo. When he tried to climb from the
pedalo onto the yacht he grabbed the bathing
platform with his hands and pushed a little too
hard with his feet. This resulted in the pedalo
moving away from the yacht and the elderly
gentleman becoming increasingly stretched out
across open water. The inevitable happened:
the gap became too wide and the gentleman fell
into the sea. The “captain” of the pedalo jumped
into the sea to help him and then the unmanned
pedalo started to drift across the bay. To cap it
all, the old man could not swim and he had his
wallet full of cash and cards in his jacket pocket.
I was swimming back to the yacht at the time
and watched these events unfold in what looked
like slow motion. It was both hilarious and very
worrying. But I am pleased to report that it all
ended without any casualties.
Owner of a 35m motor yacht
Show a little understanding
Sudden changes to the itinerary can be accommodated but it is
disappointing when guests don’t realise the cost, in time and money,
incurred by such changes. Even a change to a booked restaurant or transport
arrangement can create costs and work for our crew and support system.
Owner of a 56m sailing yachtLavatory etiquette
All the bathrooms in the male
guest and crew cabins have a
sign that says “Gentlemen, please
be seated”. This makes for a
cleaner area for the ladies.
Owner of a 55m motor yacht
A guest managed to clog the toilet
with a sanitary towel but didn’t
say anything – and she was a
superyacht owner herself!
Owner of a 40m sailing yacht
Stilett-no!
We get the occasional guest who wears
stilettos either when stepping on board for
the first time or when preparing to go out for
dinner. We always politely explain that shoes
are not to be worn while on board because
they can damage the teak. Even getting
guests to wear non-marking shoes on board
can be a challenge, because once they’re
worn off the boat most shoes pick up dirt,
gravel and sand.Owner of a 56m sailing yachtNO CHURCH TODAY
Guests should try to understand that
we cannot always be in port for Sunday
church. Surely God will forgive you if
you miss one service?
Owner of a 55m motor yachtWhen our boat is being chartered, it is a big no no if guests bring drugs on board or try to solicit sex from crew
members. Another bugbear is guests assuming the role of host and extending an open bar policy to others who
are not guests. Owner of a 36m motor yachtMy worst guest was a 50-year-old woman who immediately set her sights on one of my son’s 24-year-old
friends, and then had a fling with him openly for three days. This was only topped by her open use of marijuana
and ecstasy, which she also offered to all the kids on board. She flew up on a plane I had chartered, and three
months later she has still “forgotten” to send a cheque for her share of that charter! Owner of a 41m motor yachtI heard of a very dysfunctional family where the owner steered clear of the family
politics between his new lady and his older children in a way that resulted in all
guests on board leading separate lives. One morning, the owner decided to move
from Saint-Tropez to Corsica only to find upon arrival that he had left his still
partying children on the dock in Saint-Tropez. The crew hadn’t been able to account
for them because of the level of laissez-faire on board. O w n e r o f a 3 6 m m o t o r y a c h t
Manners
maketh
the guest
When we welcome
you aboard, we are
welcoming you into
our home. It gives us
great pleasure when
guests are able to
relax and enjoy
themselves – while
being respectful of
our boat and our
crew. Owner of a
42m motor yachtThe best way to
win our heart is to
appreciate the yacht,
the trip, the fun
and all that my wife
and I put into the
experience and
what we do to keep
the boat in top
condition – because
it’s a huge amount of
not only money, but
also time and effort.
Owner of a 40m
sailing yacht