“Part of widening the window of
tolerance is allowing kids to face adversity,
to feel disappointment and other negative
emotions and even to fail,” they write.
“That’s how we expand their green zone [of
curiosity and courage]: by lovingly teaching
them that they can live with and then move
through frustration and failure, coming out
stronger and wiser on the other side.”
- Live adventurously together
So, what happened to that trembling girl on
the beach? After talking through her fears
with her dad, she did get in the water and
swim. She finished her triathlon. And a few
years later, aged 14, she got airlifted into
a frozen runway just below the 89th degree
north. From there, she skied 150km across
shifting ice to the North Pole, becoming the
youngest woman to do so. Her name is Jade
Hameister and in 2016 she was Australian
Geographic’s Young Adventurer of the Year.
Since then, the Melbourne schoolgirl
has completed more difficult expeditions
— across the Greenland icecap and to the
South Pole — always hauling her own sled.
She has also given TEDx talks about her
challenges and being #bravenotperfect.
Her mum Vanessa isn’t quite sure where
this courage comes from but thinks family
life has something to do with it. “We were
always just outdoors,” Vanessa recalls.
When Jade was young, she went on training
hikes with her dad, a mountaineer. By age
six, she had climbed Mt Kosciuszko and
spent countless weekends scrambling or
jumping between rocks at the beach.
This modelling of courage and bravery
sinks deep into children’s brains, says Maggie
Dent — even if they’re small things like riding
a bike, trying new foods or speaking out
in public. Telling adventure stories? That’s
a great idea, too, whether they’re about your
own childhood or from a book.“My parents weren’t outdoorsy at
all,” says Caroline Paul, whose models
were Harriet the Spy and Sherlock
Holmes. “I was a really shy kid ... but
I read a lot of books about adventures.
And I wanted them.”- Expose children to risk
In today’s world, even allowing your
children to walk to school or climb trees
can feel irresponsible. This isn’t just
robbing children of their childhoods,
argues Maggie Dent, it’s also stealing
adulthoods. Grownups who can’t take
risks miss out on the best in life: the
top jobs, the exciting travel, the heart-
thumping love stories.
This might sound scary, but research
shows children who take more risks in
play have more self-confidence and are
less anxious. Importantly, they’re also
better at assessing risk themselves.
wellbeing.com.au | 41parenting
ADVENTUROUS KIDS