Golf_Digest_USA_-_May_2019

(Ben W) #1
top: mansell/getty images • illustrations: paul windle • bethpage:

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46 golfdigest.com | may 2019


The Golf Life The Digest


NEW YORK-FLAVORED INSULTS


TO USE DURING THE PGA


CHAMPIONSHIP AT BETHPAGE


you putt like
the knicks shoot!

you’re softer
than the inside
of a knish!

you have a better
chance finding
a cab in midtown
during rush hour
than a fairway!

you’re older than
the brooklyn bridge!

a field guide to the golfers of different states


new york golfer
▶ On-course
performance
mirrors state of
stock market.

california golfer
▶ Leaves after 16
holes to beat traffic.

texas golfer
▶ Carries oversize
driver, bag, ball
marker; takes over-
size divot.

vermont golfer
▶ Rates courses by
their foliage.

florida golfer
▶ Arrives at course
on souped-up
custom golf cart.

colorado golfer
▶ Heads into weeds
to look for a lost
ball, returns craving
potato chips.

golf is, in part,
a game; but only in part.
it is also in part a religion,
a fever, a vice, a mirage, a frenzy,
a fear, an abscess, a joy,
a thrill, a pest, a disease, an uplift,
a brooding, a melancholy,
a dream of yesterday,
and a hope for tomorrow.
new york tribune, 1916
Free download pdf