an impressive professional record. But very early in a relationship, the
instinctive reaction is What else is coming? If he shares that with me so
quickly, what else is he hiding? A closetful of espouses, a criminal record,
walls papered with rejection letters? Your new acquaintance has no way of
knowing your confession was a generous act, a well-intentioned revelation,
on your part.
So far, in this section, you have found assertive methods for meeting
people and mastering small talk. The next is both an assertive and defensive
move to help spare you that pasty smile we tend to sport when we have no
idea what people are talking about.
Technique #22
Ac-cen-tu-ate the Pos-i-tive
When first meeting someone, lock your closet door and save your
skeletons for later. You and your new good friend can invite the skeletons
out, have a good laugh, and dance over their bones later in the relationship.
But nows the time, as the old song says, to ac-cen-tu-ate the pos-i-tive and
elim-i-nate the neg-a-tive.
How to Always Have Something Interesting to Say
Youve heard folks whine, I cant go to the party, I havent got a thing to
wear. When was the last time you heard, I cant go to the party, I havent got
a thing to say?
When going to a gathering with great networking possibilties, you
naturally plan your outfit and make sure your shoes will match. And, of
course, you must have just the right tie or correct color lipstick. You puff
your hair, pack your business cards, and youre off.
Whoa! Wait a minute. Didnt you forget the most important thing? What
about the right conversation to enhance your image? Are you actually going
to say anything that comes to mindor doesntat the moment? You wouldnt
don the first outfit your groping hand hits in the darkened closet, so you
shouldnt leave your conversing to the first thought that comes to mind when
faing a group of expectant, smiling faces. You will, of course, folow your
instincts in conversation. But at least be prepared in case inspiration doesnt
hit.
The best way to ensure youre conversationally in the swing of things is
to listen to a newscast just before you leave. Whats hapening right now in
the worldall the fires, floods, air disasters, toppled governments, and stock
market crashespulverizes into
ooja
(Ooja)
#1