Stillness Is the Key by Ryan Holiday

riches story his life was—almost like the plot of an epic poem—to go
from that cabin to the presidency. Grant shrugged. “Well I never
thought about it in that light.”
This is also confidence. Which needs neither congratulations nor
glory in which to revel, because it is an honest understanding of our
strengths and weakness that reveals the path to a greater glory: inner
peace and a clear mind.
Confident people know what matters. They know when to ignore
other people’s opinions. They don’t boast or lie to get ahead (and
then struggle to deliver). Confidence is the freedom to set your own
standards and unshackle yourself from the need to prove yourself. A
confident person doesn’t fear disagreement and doesn’t see change—
swapping an incorrect opinion for a correct one—as an admission of
inferiority.
Ego, on the other hand, is unsettled by doubts, afflicted by hubris,
exposed by its own boasting and posturing. And yet it will not probe
itself—or allow itself to be probed—because it knows what might be
found.
But confident people are open, reflective, and able to see
themselves without blinders. All this makes room for stillness, by
removing unnecessary conflict and uncertainty and resentment.
And you? Where are you on this spectrum?
There are going to be setbacks in life. Even a master or a genius
will experience a period of inadequacy when they attempt to learn
new skills or explore new domains. Confidence is what determines
whether this will be a source of anguish or an enjoyable challenge. If
you’re miserable every time things are not going your way, if you
cannot enjoy it when things are going your way because you
undermine it with doubts and insecurity, life will be hell.
And sure, there is no such thing as full confidence, or ever-
present confidence. We will waver. We will have doubts. We will find
ourselves in new situations of complete uncertainty. But still, we
want to look inside that chaos and find that kernel of calm
confidence. That was what Kennedy did in the Cuban Missile Crisis.
He had been in tough situations before, like when his PT boat sank in
the Pacific and all appeared to be lost. He learned then that panic
solved nothing, and that salvation rarely came from rash action. He