2019-06-01_Golf_Digest

june 2019 | golfdigest.com 45

by sam weinman + alex myers

Plumb-bob:

ar

TH

ur Tilley/

Ge

TT

y ima

Ge

S • a

ST

rolo

Gy: c

Hri

ST

ian nor

TH

ea

ST

•

Tro

PH

y: allan

Swar

T/

Ge

TT

y ima

Ge

S •

Gol

Fer

S: P

Ho

To and

co/

Ge

TT

y ima

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S

THE ROMANCE OF JUNE

21 (“GOLF’S LONGEST

DAY”) VS. THE REALITY

MORE TIME FOR THE GROUP IN

FRONT OF YOU TO PLUMB-BOB.

THAT CHICKEN SALAD MADE

FRESH DAILY? NO LONGER

SO FRESH WHEN YOU GET IT.

AMPLE OPPORTUNITY TO

EXPOSE AREAS YOU MISSED

WITH SUNSCREEN.

WHEN YOUR WHEELS

COME OFF, THEY REMAIN

OFF... FOR HOURS.

YOUR GASBAG PLAYING

PARTNER HAS GOT

MORE STORIES FOR YOU!

TROPHIES WE’D

LIKE TO HAND OUT

THIS SEASON

small-bills

carrier

quick pick-

er-upper

default

scorecard-

keeper

broken-tee

saver

default

flagstick-

replacer

tee-box

joke teller

human

golf-ball

finder

caddie-lev-

el bunker

raker

what the stars reveal about your game

water

cancer, scorpio, pisces

▶ Nothing better than an intimate

conversation with a walk-up single.

No. 3 tee isn’t too soon for a plain-

tive comment about your marriage.

fire

aries, leo, sagittarius

▶ Getting wrapped up in the compe-

tition is the point. You’ll apologize

for what you said to your four-ball

partner in your own time.

earth

taurus, virgo, capricorn

▶ You were loyal to Tiger during

the hard years. Tear up during a

rebroadcast of the 2018 Tour

Championship without shame.

air

gemini, libra, aquarius

▶ To play is to learn. Just because

you can’t break 85 doesn’t mean

others won’t benefit from your

swing advice.

it’s not you.

it’s your

woefully

inferior

golf game.

this game just isn’t

fair sometimes. i mean,

today was fair, obviously.

but other times

it’s not fair.

on the bright side,

you probably

learned a lot

watching me.

it could have gone

either way:

i could have won by

a little or by a lot.

my advice? take two

weeks off from the game

and then quit. WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU WIN

hey, tomorrow’s a new day.

and that’s the day you should

pursue a new hobby.