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VEGNEWS.COM^ VegNews 87
the healing power of vegan cupcakes).
Whether for the first or second time,
should you decide to tie the knot, know
this: everything, even marriage, is
impermanent. The only way to succeed at
a relationship is to relentlessly work on
yourself, so that you can bring a mentally
and physically healthy you to your
partnership. Marriage, though somewhat
binding, should not ever equal obligation.
As a divorced woman about to turn 40,
I cannot stress enough the importance
of understanding the value of inner-
resources. Once you have those firmly
in place, you can turn your attention
outward, too—to the beautiful person
smiling in front of you amongst the pink
fog, strobe lights, and Elvis—and you, too,
can say “I do” and know you have a strong
fighting chance.
Here’s to the best gamble of your life!
Jasmin Singer (jasminsinger.com) is the
Digital Director of VegNews, the author of the
memoir Always Too Much and Never Enough,
and the cohost of the Our Hen House podcast.
What Happens in Vegas ...
Eloping in Vegas was the best decision I ever made.
Here’s what that magical day looked like.
10am: Leave Los Angeles
for a roadtrip across the
desert to Vegas. Don’t
forget Lucy, our dog.
11:30am: First stop:
gas up and swing by
Carl’s Jr. for a lunch-on-
the-go. Order a Beyond
Famous Star (hold the
cheese and mayo).
1pm: In lieu of vows, write
“Marriage Bill of Rights”
in the Notes app on
phone. This is basically
an agreed-upon set of
rules for how to show
up in conflict (pro-tip:
you can’t always reach
resolution, but you can
agree to end an argument
with empathy and
kindness).
4:30pm: It’s getting late
and there’s no time to
stop by Whole Foods, so
call the photographer and
beg her to pick up some
vegetables to put together
a veggie bouquet.
5:30pm: Put on the $200
wedding dress I picked up
a couple days ago. Make
the bold decision not to
wear the uncomfortable
heels, but to instead wear
my favorite plastic saddle
shoes from Goodwill.
6:15pm: Head down the
elevator, through the
casino, and start getting
used to people hooting
and clapping. Meet the
stretch-limo driver and
head to the chapel.
6:45pm: Arrive at the
Viva Las Vegas Wedding
Chapel, meet the
photographer and gawk
at the gorgeous veggie
bouquet she put together
for you, and get ready to
get married.
7:10pm: Hop onto the
back of the pink Cadillac
driven by Elvis, who will
shortly be driving us
down the aisle.
7:15pm: Let the show
begin! After arriving
in style at the altar,
slow-dance with my
honey and my dog to
“Love Me Tender.”
7:30pm: Say “I do!”
and stomp on the glass!
Mazel Tov!
7:45pm: Get into the limo,
enjoy some champagne,
and head downtown
for some food and
photo opps.
8:45pm: Head to The
Modern Vegan for chicken
and waffles, followed
by a two-person sundae
appropriately called the
“I Love You.”
9:15pm: Drive to the iconic
“Welcome to Las Vegas”
sign and pose for a photo
using a vegan doughnut
as the stand-in ring.
10pm: Head back to the
hotel and quickly play the
slots. Win $70, then
call it a night.