Exercise 3: What to Do When Your
Spouse Doesn’t Turn toward YouIf one of you is feeling rebuffed by the other lately, or overwhelmed
by your spouse's need for closeness, you should both fill out the form
below and then share your answers. There is no answer key for these
questions, they are merely a point of departure for discussions with
your spouse. The bottom line of this approach is that there isn't one
reality when a couple misses each other in little ways. There are two
equally legitimate perspectives.
Once you understand and acknowledge this, you'll find that
reconnecting just comes naturally.
During this week I felt:
- Defensive A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Hurt A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Angry A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Sad A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Misunderstood A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Criticized A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Worried A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Righteously A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
indignant - Unappreciated A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Unattractive A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Disgusted A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Disapproving A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Like leaving A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
- Like my opinions A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
didn't matter - I had no idea A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all
what I was feeling - Lonely A Great Deal Definitely a little Not at all