Parenting With Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility

Mom scoops Jasmine up lovingly and walks her to her room
going through all six steps of using the “Uh-Oh” song:
Step one: Sing out, “Uh-oh! Looks like a little bedroom
time,” while quickly and gently moving the child to the
recovery area. This is often the child’s room but can be
any other place where the child cannot be with the family.
Step two: Sing, “Feel free to have a nice little fit. We’ll
see you when you are sweet.” Keep your voice melodic
while saying this to avoid sounding angry, frustrated, and
sarcastic.
Step three: If necessary, offer choices about how the child
will stay in the room: “Do you want to stay in your room
with the door open or shut?” Then, if the child comes out,
you say, “How sad. You chose shut.”
If the child comes out again, offer another choice, “Do
you want to stay in your room with the door shut or
locked? It’s your choice.” If the child comes out again, you
say, “How sad. You chose locked.” (Because most doors
don’t have a lock on the outside, a good solution is to
wedge a towel over the top of the door to keep it shut.)
Safety is a prime consideration at this point, so stay
close in case of emergency, but do not talk to the child
through the door or acknowledge that you are waiting just
outside. You can even turn up the TV so that it appears you
are having more fun than the child.
Step four: The child will remain in the room until calm.
Do not talk to the child during this time even if it sounds
like war is going on in the room.
Step five: Once the child is calm, the adult sets the egg
timer for four or five minutes. It is important that the child
has at least this amount of time to think, I want to be with
the family.
Step six: Once the child has demonstrated four or five
consecutive minutes of calm behavior, he or she returns to