Proceed to 2 and then to 3, if necessary. Do not look at anyone else
other than your child. At this point, of course, parents wonder, “What
are we going to do at 3? There’s no time-out room.” This problem is
easier to solve than you think.
Time-Out Room, Time-Out Place
Over the many years of developing the 1-2-3 Magic program, parents
taught me what to do in situations like this. These were parents who,
in the heat of battle, had to come up with rest-period solutions while
in restaurants, theaters, stores, the museum, the ballpark, and church.
We call the solution “Time-Out Room, Time-Out Place.” There is
always a room, something like a room, or a symbolic place where a
time-out can be served. For example, in the candy aisle conflict we
just described, at the count of 3, some parents stay right where they
are and hold the child’s hand for several minutes. The adult says
nothing during this period. That’s a time-out place. One young mother
actually carried a small time-out mat around with her and would
simply plop it onto the floor of the store when necessary.
Other parents have put little children in the grocery cart for the
consequence. Other ideas include a corner of the store—a time-out
place. For more rambunctious children, the bathroom of the store can
serve the same purpose. Let them scream their heads off in there for a
while. Some parents, feeling their children play up to an audience,
will actually leave the grocery cart right where it is and take the child
back to the car to do the rest period. Using the car like this makes
some people ask, “Why should I have to go through all the trouble of
leaving the store?”
The answer is because:
- They’re just kids.