103Stewardship
A helpful way to understand setting limits is that our lives
are a gift from God. Just as a store manager takes good care of a
shop for the owner, we are to do the same with our souls. If a
lack of boundaries causes us to mismanage the store, the owner
has a right to be upset with us.
We are to develop our lives, abilities, feelings, thoughts, and
behaviors. Our spiritual and emotional growth is God’s “inter-
est” on his investment in us. When we say no to people and
activities that are hurtful to us, we are protecting God’s invest-
ment. As you can see, there’s quite a difference between self-
ishness and stewardship.
Myth #2: Boundaries Are a Sign of Disobedience
Many Christians fear that setting and keeping limits signals
rebellion, or disobedience. In religious circles you’ll often hear
statements such as, “Your unwillingness to go along with our
program shows an unresponsive heart.” Because of this myth,
countless individuals remain trapped in endless activities of no
genuine spiritual and emotional value.
The truth is life-changing: a lack of boundaries is often a sign
of disobedience. People who have shaky limits are often com-
pliant on the outside, but rebellious and resentful on the inside.
They would like to be able to say no, but are afraid. So they
cover their fear with a half-hearted yes, as Barry did.
Barry had almost made it to his car after church when Ken
caught up with him. Here goes, Barry thought. Maybe I can still
get out of this one.
“Barry!” Ken boomed. “Glad I caught you!”
The singles class officer in charge of Bible studies, Ken was
a dedicated recruiter to the studies he presided over; however,
he was often insensitive to the fact that not everyone wanted to
attend his meetings.
“So which study can I put you down for, Barry? The one on
prophecy, evangelism, or Mark?”
Common Boundary Myths