Atsuchtimeshewithdrawsfromrelationshipsorintimacyandremainsstuckinhiscave.Heaskshimself
whatitisallfor,and why heshouldbother.Hedoesn'tknowthathehasstopped caring becausehe
doesn'tfeelneeded.Hedoesnotrealize thatbyfindingsomeonewhoneedshim,hecanshakeoffhis
depressionandbemotivatedagain.
Whenamandoesn'tfeelheismakingapositivedifferencein someoneelse'slife,itishardforhimto
continuecaringabouthislifeandrelationships.Itisdifficulttobemotivatedwhenheisnotneeded.To
becomemotivatedagainheneedstofeelappreciated,trusted,andaccepted.Nottobeneededisaslow
deathforaman.
WHENAWOMANLOVESAMAN.....................................................................................................
AwomanfallinginlovewithamanissimilartowhattookplacewhenthefirstVenusianbelievedthatthe
Martianswerecoming.Shedreamedthatafleetofspaceshipsfromtheheavenswouldlandandaraceof
strongandcaringMartianswouldemerge.Thesebeingswouldnotneednurturingbutinsteadwantedto
provideforandtakecareoftheVenusians.
TheseMartianswereverydevotedandwereinspiredby theVenusianbeautyandculture.TheMartians
recognized that their power and competence were meaningless without someone to serve. These
wondrousandadmirablebeingshadfoundreliefandinspirationinthepromiseofserving,pleasing,and
fulfillingtheVenusians.Whatamiracle!
OtherVenusians had similar dreams and instantly cameoutoftheir depressions. The realization that
transformedtheVenusianswasthebeliefthathelpwasonthewaybecausetheMartianswerecoming.
TheVenusianshadbeendepressedbecausetheyfeltisolatedandalone.Tocomeoutofdepressionthey
neededtofeelthatlovinghelpwasontheway.
Mostmenhavelittleawarenessofhowimportantitistoawomantofeelsupportedbysomeonewhocares.
Women arehappy whentheybelieve theirneedswillbemet.Whenawoman isupset,overwhelmed,
confused,exhausted,orhopelesswhatsheneedsmostissimplecompanionship.Sheneedstofeelsheis
notalone.Sheneedstofeellovedandcherished.
Empathy, understanding, validation, and compassion go a long way to assist her in becoming more
receptiveandappreciativeofhissupport.Mendon'trealizethisbecausetheirMartianinstinctstellthemit's
besttobealonewhentheyareupset.Whensheisupset,outofrespecthewillleaveheralone,orifhe
stayshemakesmattersworsebytryingtosolveherproblems.Hedoesnotinstinctivelyrealizehowvery
importantcloseness,intimacy,andsharingaretoher.Whatsheneedsmostisjustsomeonetolisten.
Throughsharingherfeelingsshebeginstorememberthatsheisworthyofloveandthatherneedswillbe
fulfilled.Doubtandmistrustmeltaway.Hertendencytobecompulsiverelaxesassheremembersthatshe