family. But did the child bring shame? No. The child
brought shameful things to light. The family shame predated
and caused the child’s distress. “What will the neighbors
think?” is a shaming device aimed at continuing a
conspiracy of illness.
The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life
which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately
or in the long run.
HENRY DAVID THOREAUArt opens the closets, airs out the cellars and attics. It
brings healing. But before a wound can heal it must be seen,
and this act of exposing the wound to air and light, the
artist’s act, is often reacted to with shaming. Bad reviews are
a prime source of shame for many artists. The truth is, many
reviews do aim at creating shame in an artist. “Shame on
you! How dare you make that rotten piece of art?”
For the artist who endured childhood shaming—over any
form of neediness, any type of exploration, any expectation
—shame may kick in even without the aid of a shame-
provoking review. If a child has ever been made to feel
foolish for believing himself or herself talented, the act of
actually finishing a piece of art will be fraught with internal
shaming.
Many artists begin a piece of work, get well along in it,
and then find, as they near completion, that the work seems