26: Blues To Bebop and Beyond
- Other blues liquids:
wine from a bottle in a sack;
Irish whiskey from a dirty glass;
muddy water (usually not for drinking). - Not blues beverages:
any mixed drink, or drink with an umbrella in it;
any kosher wine;
Yoo Hoo (all flavors). - If it occurs in a fleabag motel or in a shotgun shack, it’s a blues death.
Other blues deaths: being stabbed in the back by a jealous lover,
being pushed down an old mine shaft, crying yourself to death. You
cannot die a blues death during a tennis match or during a liposuction
treatment. - Some blues names for women:
Sadie
Big Mama
Bessie
Billie - Some blues names for men:
Joe (including “Big”, “Old”, or “Blind” in any combination, but not Little
Willie (Little Willie could work)
Lightnin’
Almost anything with Howlin’ in front of it
Other possibilities include physical infirmities: Blind, Cripple, Wheezin’
Fruit names: lemon, lime, (not pomegranate)
Presidents: Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, (not Bush) - Persons with names like Sierra, Sequoia, or Chauncey will not be per-
mitted to sing the blues no matter how many men they kill in Mem-
phis.