contentsbackedupthere;theotherwelaidintheopen
abdominalcavitytoemptythefluidoutsidehergut.Then
we closed up, and we were done.
Itoldherfamilyweweren’tabletohelphereatagain,
and when Douglass woke up I told her, as well. Her
daughterhad tears.Herhusbandthankedusfortrying.
Douglass tried to put a brave face on it.
“I was never obsessed with food anyway,” she said.
The tubes relieved her nausea and abdominal pain
greatly—“90percent,” shesaid. The nursestaught her
howtoopenthegastrictubeintoabagwhenshefeltsick
andtheabdominaltubewhenherbellyfelttootight.We
toldhershecoulddrinkwhatevershewantedandeven
eatsoftfoodforthetaste.Threedaysaftersurgeryshe
wenthomewithhospicetolookafterher.Beforesheleft,
her oncologistand theoncologynursepractitionersaw
her. Douglass asked them how long they thought she had.
“Theybothfilledupwithtears,”shetoldme.“Itwaskind
of my answer.”
AfewdaysafterDouglassleftthehospital,sheandher
familyallowedmetostopbyherhomeafterwork.She
answeredthedoorherself,wearingarobebecauseofthe
tubesandapologizingforit.Wesatinherlivingroom,
and I asked how she was doing.
Shewasdoingokay,shesaid.“IthinkIhaveameasure
thatI’mslip,slip,slipping,”butshehadbeenseeingold
friendsandrelativesallday,andshelovedit.“It’smy
lifeblood,really,soIwanttodoit.”Herfamilystaggered
the visits to keep them from tiring her out.