special—someone picked out and recognized by our soul. It
is a decision made in our hearts that sometimes feels as though
it were made in heaven.
FINDING A SOUL MATE
A soul mate is someone who has the unique ability to bring
out the best in us. Soul mates are not perfect, but perfect for
us. While they can bring out the best in us, without good
communication skills they can also bring out the worst in us,
and vice versa. We are not just physically turned on to them;
our soul gets turned on as well.
There are basically four kinds of chemistry between dating
partners; physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Physical
chemistry generates desire. Emotional chemistry generates
affection. Mental chemistry creates interest. Spiritual chemistry
creates love. A soul mate includes all four.
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION IS NOT ENOUGH
Physical chemistry alone is very short-lived. A man can easily
be turned on by a seductive woman who promises sexual
gratification without any strings. For many young men, just
the opportunity for sex causes physical chemistry. After a few
brief encounters of physical passion this chemistry will quickly
dissipate.
I was amazed as a counselor to discover a striking pattern.
Quite often women who were extremely attractive, who looked
like models and movie stars, and in some cases were, would
share the same complaint. Their husbands were not sexually
attracted to them. I was dumbfounded. I couldn’t imagine any
available man not being attracted to these women. Yet it was
true. I eventually realized why.
FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON FOR YOU / 17