Michael was one of the most intense young men I have ever met. Still living with
his parents at 28, he had no social life and had never had a girlfriend. ‘Why would
any girl want to talk to me?’ he asked me.
Within two minutes of meeting him the reason was obvious. He had no apparent
sense of humour. The only TV programmes he watched were documentaries, and
he couldn’t name a single comedian who made him laugh. When he met people
he was so eager to show off his immense knowledge that they soon switched off.
He thought that sharing his problems would make women sympathetic, but it
merely drove them away. Then he would take offence at their ‘rudeness’ and go
into a sulk.
Michael was in therapy for several months, during which he learned, among other
things, to use the I-T-I-A Formula©, find a purpose and cultivate some social skills.
But the biggest breakthrough came when he realised his serious demeanour put
people off. He immediately resolved to lighten up and the change over the follow-
ing weeks was remarkable.
A few months after he concluded therapy a postcard arrived from Egypt. He had quit
his job and set off on a world tour with his new girlfriend. The following year he sent
cards from India, Malaysia, Australia, New Zealand, and South and North America.
I have no idea where he is now or what he’s doing, but I imagine it’s a lot of fun!
49 LIGHTEN UP
Whoever makes you laugh helps you live.
Menander
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