Body Language

The fig leaf: Men hold hands with themselves in a barrier position to

make themselves feel secure. Covering their ‘crown jewels’ they subcon-

sciously protect themselves from a potential full frontal attack (see

Figure 8-2). Look at the line-up of soccer players during a penalty kick

and see where they place their hands and arms.

The next time you see someone who’s feeling lonely, dejected, or in any way

vulnerable, notice how he positions his hands. You see that he holds his

hands in the fig-leaf position in an attempt to create feelings of comfort and

reassurance.

Placing objects in front of yourself ..................................................

By placing a coffee cup, a clipboard, or any other object between yourself

and another person, you are setting up a protective barrier. These barriers

are a subconscious effort to conceal any nervousness or insecurity you may

be experiencing, whether you’re aware of the feeling or not.

During a role play with a client in which she had to enter her boss’s office, sit

across the table from him, and make a recommendation that she knew he

wouldn’t like, Lynne clutched a pad of paper in front of her, clasping it tightly

to her chest. Although she said that she had to carry the pad for taking

Figure 8-2:

The fig leaf

position

makes a

person feel

more

secure.

130 Part III: The Trunk: Limbs and Roots