Get over your imaginary failure scenarios and just DO SOMETHING!
Having a girl say, "Oh, no thanks, I'm in a relationship" isn't that bad, you
know. Women are usually flattered when they pass, really! One of my friends
who‘s absolutely killer with the ladies has a simple goal whenever he interacts
with a woman: just make her smile. He‘s not trying for home base on his
initial approach; all he wants is to add a bright moment to their day and get a
smile. This guy has more fun approaching women than anyone I‘ve ever
seen... he‘s amazing.
And he always expects the woman to enjoy the interaction.
If you can take a light-hearted attitude towards the outcome, you‘ll find that
instead of harsh rejection after harsh rejection, you‘ll end up with a mix of
friendly conversations that lead to some sign of non-interest (the boyfriend or
lesbian scenario you were so scared of) and friendly conversations that lead to
your getting a name, e-mail, and number, and the potential for more.
So stop making up reasons why you should fail, and start asking yourself
better questions. Things will start to work much better that way.
Fearing the Unknown
Meeting new women in a romantic context is a situation involving a lot of
unknowns, so it causes fear and anxiety. You don‘t know if she‘s got a
boyfriend, if she‘s sick of being hit on already tonight, if she‘s a man-hating
femi-nazi, etc. You also might not know what to expect from the interaction
and not being able to anticipate the dynamics you will encounter makes the
situation even more intimidating.
Unfortunately, if you allow this fear of the unknown to prevent you from
making an approach, this inhibitor will never change. The only way to find out
what level of receptivity you will encounter is to try, and the only way to get
truly comfortable with how the dynamics tend to play out is to experience
them.
Studying the theory in this book will help you know what to expect the
dynamics to be and will help you realize that it doesn‘t matter if she turns out
to be unreceptive. In the end though, it still comes down to your having the
balls to go ahead and approach a woman you don‘t know. The more you do it,
the easier it becomes, but you have to start doing it at some point.
If you don‘t get the subtle psychology I‘m revealing behind attraction, or
you understand but don‘t believe them, it‘s going to be hard to take action
because these are the rules of the game. You‘re not going to get much
improvement in your dating life until you absorb this material. If you can‘t
learn it here theoretically, it‘s going to be much more difficult for you to learn
it the hard-way.