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126 CHAPTER 5HOW CAN I CHANGE MY SELF-TALK?It is important to understand and to change your unproductive self-
talk. After identifying and understanding the nature of your negative
self-talk, you can counter it with positive, supportive statements. This
requires writing down and actually rehearsing positive statements that
directly refute your negative self-talk (Bourne, 1995).
Bourne provided some examples of positive counterstatements that
can be used with each of the four types of negative self-talk. She rec-
ommended avoiding negative statements (e.g., “I’m not going to panic
when I start the test”) and focusing on positive statements: (e.g., “I’m
prepared for this test”). She also suggested keeping counterstatements
in the present tense and in the first person (e.g., “I can... ” “I will
now... ” “I am learning to... ”).The Worrier
Instead of “What if... ” say, “So what, I can handle this,”
“I can be anxious and still do this,” “I’ll get used to this
with practice.”
The Critic
Instead of self-criticism, say, “I’m okay the way I am,”
“I accept and believe in myself.”
The Victim
Instead of feeling hopeless, say, “I can continue to make
progress one step at a time.” “I acknowledge the progress
I’ve made and will continue to improve.”
The Perfectionist
Instead of demanding perfection, say, “It’s okay to make
mistakes. Setbacks are part of the process and an important
learning experience.”The procedure shown in Table 5.2 was developed by Butler (1981)
to help individuals understand and change any self-talk that is pre-
venting them from reaching their goals. Note how you can apply the
self-management cycle in mastering this strategy: self-observation and
evaluation (Steps 1–3), goal setting and strategic planning, and strat-
egy implementation and monitoring (Steps 4–5). The fourth step in
the cycle, strategic outcome and monitoring, becomes a function of
your assessment of behavior change.An Example of Analyzing Self-Talk
Sharon is graduating from high school and would like to major in
biology in college because she plans to attend medical school. She
decides instead to major in business, because her friends have told her
about the many years of difficult study necessary to achieve her