304 Chapter 9and there is a greater status differential be-
tween women and men. When women have
less access to economic resources, it is not
surprising that they value a mate’s access to
economic resources.Relationship Initiation
Do you remember your first date? How did it
come about? Who contacted whom? Who de-
cided what to do? How do women and men
become involved in romantic relationships?
Traditionally, the male has taken the
initiative in romantic relationships. Today,
it is more acceptable for women to invite
men on a date, and there are more forums
set up for female initiation; there are dances
in high school and parties in college where
females are intended to initiate. Yet these
forums are distinct because they focus on
the female as the initiator. Female initia-
tion is not normative. There is evidence that
when females initiate first dates, men expect
greater sexual involvement—although, in
actuality, there is no evidence that more
sexual behavior occurs when females initiate
(Mongeau et al., 2006).
One way to examine how relation-
ships develop is to examine first datescripts.
Ascriptis a schema or cognitive representa-
tion of a sequence of events. These scripts
are gender based. In essence, the male is pro-
active and the female is reactive (Mongeau
et al., 2006). The male initiates the date,
decides what to do on the date, arranges
transportation, pays for the date, and initiates
sexual contact. By contrast, the female accepts
or rejects the invitation, the plans for the date,
and sexual advances (Honeycutt & Cantrill,
2001). Men’s first date scripts consist of more
gender-stereotypical behavior (e.g., asking for
date, initiating sex) than women’s first date
scripts, which may indicate that the script
for a first date is more rigid for men than forA third theory of mate preferences is
social construction theory, which argues
that social norms dictate what is desirable in
a mate. A study of American and Israeli col-
lege students supported this theory (Pines,
2001). Students were interviewed about their
most significant romantic relationship and
asked why they had fallen in love. Consis-
tent with evolutionary theory, 80% of men
and 53% of women mentioned physical ap-
pearance. However, 89% of men and 97%
of women mentioned personality, so physi-
cal appearance was not the most important
feature named. Only 4% of men and women
mentioned status, contradicting evolution-
ary theory. The primary finding of the study,
however, was that there were more cultural
differences than sex differences in mate
preferences, emphasizing how norms shape
what is attractive in a mate. Americans were
more influenced by status and similarity
than Israelis. A study of mate preferences in
the United States and the People’s Republic
of China also supported social construction
theory (Toro-Morn & Sprecher, 2003). The
most important preferences in a mate were
the same for both countries: honest, trust-
worthy, warm, kind, healthy, sense of humor.
The least important preferences also were
the same: age, popularity, wealth, and so-
cial status. There were more sex differences
in China than in the United States. In both
countries, men preferred a younger mate
and a physically attractive mate compared
to women, whereas women preferred a mate
with high social status compared to men.
These differences, however, were larger in
China than in the United States. In addition,
only in China did men value a mate who was
a good housekeeper more than women. It is
not a surprise that the sex differences in mate
preferences were larger in a culture where
women’s and men’s roles are more distinctM09_HELG0185_04_SE_C09.indd 304 6/21/11 12:40 PM